Shawn's Blog

2010-04-28T01:53:00.002+08:00

www.AspaceforRants.blogspot.com

2010-04-28T00:18:00.004+08:00

An article about anger

And quite a well written one, in my opinion. I've bold some points i find particularly interesting, or good to note.

Introduction

We all know what anger is, and we've all felt it: whether as a fleeting annoyance or as full-fledged rage.

Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems—problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life. And it can make you feel as though you're at the mercy of an unpredictable and powerful emotion. This brochure is meant to help you understand and control anger.

The Nature of Anger

Anger is "an emotional state that varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage," according to Charles Spielberger, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in the study of anger. Like other emotions, it is accompanied by physiological and biological changes; when you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure go up, as do the levels of your energy hormones, adrenaline, and noradrenaline.

Anger can be caused by both external and internal events. You could be angry at a specific person (Such as a coworker or supervisor) or event (a traffic jam, a canceled flight), or your anger could be caused by worrying or brooding about your personal problems. Memories of traumatic or enraging events can also trigger angry feelings.

Expressing Anger

The instinctive, natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively. Anger is a natural, adaptive response to threats; it inspires powerful, often aggressive, feelings and behaviors, which allow us to fight and to defend ourselves when we are attacked. A certain amount of anger, therefore, is necessary to our survival.

On the other hand, we can't physically lash out at every person or object that irritates or annoys us; laws, social norms, and common sense place limits on how far our anger can take us.

People use a variety of both conscious and unconscious processes to deal with their angry feelings. The three main approaches are expressing, suppressing, and calming. Expressing your angry feelings in an assertive—not aggressive—manner is the healthiest way to express anger. To do this, you have to learn how to make clear what your needs are, and how to get them met, without hurting others. Being assertive doesn't mean being pushy or demanding; it means being respectful of yourself and others.

Anger can be suppressed, and then converted or redirected. This happens when you hold in your anger, stop thinking about it, and focus on something positive. The aim is to inhibit or suppress your anger and convert it into more constructive behavior. The danger in this type of response is that if it isn't allowed outward expression, your anger can turn inward—on yourself. Anger turned inward may cause hypertension, high blood pressure, or depression.

Unexpressed anger can create other problems. It can lead to pathological expressions of anger, such as passive-aggressive behavior (getting back at people indirectly, without telling them why, rather than confronting them head-on) or a personality that seems perpetually cynical and hostile. People who are constantly putting others down, criticizing everything, and making cynical comments haven't learned how to constructively express their anger. Not surprisingly, they aren't likely to have many successful relationships.

Finally, you can calm down inside. This means not just controlling your outward behavior, but also controlling your internal responses, taking steps to lower your heart rate, calm yourself down, and let the feelings subside.

As Dr. Spielberger notes, "when none of these three techniques work, that's when someone—or something—is going to get hurt."

Anger Management

The goal of anger management is to reduce both your emotional feelings and the physiological arousal that anger causes. You can't get rid of, or avoid, the things or the people that enrage you, nor can you change them, but you can learn to control your reactions.

Are You Too Angry?

There are psychological tests that measure the intensity of angry feelings, how prone to anger you are, and how well you handle it. But chances are good that if you do have a problem with anger, you already know it. If you find yourself acting in ways that seem out of control and frightening, you might need help finding better ways to deal with this emotion.

Why Are Some People More Angry Than Others?

According to Jerry Deffenbacher, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in anger management, some people really are more "hotheaded" than others are; they get angry more easily and more intensely than the average person does. There are also those who don't show their anger in loud spectacular ways but are chronically irritable and grumpy. Easily angered people don't always curse and throw things; sometimes they withdraw socially, sulk, or get physically ill.

People who are easily angered generally have what some psychologists call a low tolerance for frustration, meaning simply that they feel that they should not have to be subjected to frustration, inconvenience, or annoyance. They can't take things in stride, and they're particularly infuriated if the situation seems somehow unjust: for example, being corrected for a minor mistake.

What makes these people this way? A number of things. One cause may be genetic or physiological: There is evidence that some children are born irritable, touchy, and easily angered, and that these signs are present from a very early age. Another may be sociocultural. Anger is often regarded as negative; we're taught that it's all right to express anxiety, depression, or other emotions but not to express anger. As a result, we don't learn how to handle it or channel it constructively.

Research has also found that family background plays a role. Typically, people who are easily angered come from families that are disruptive, chaotic, and not skilled at emotional communications.

Is It Good To "Let it All Hang Out?"

Psychologists now say that this is a dangerous myth. Some people use this theory as a license to hurt others. Research has found that "letting it rip" with anger actually escalates anger and aggression and does nothing to help you (or the person you're angry with) resolve the situation.

It's best to find out what it is that triggers your anger, and then to develop strategies to keep those triggers from tipping you over the edge.

Strategies to keep Anger at bay

Relaxation
Simple relaxation tools, such as deep breathing and relaxing imagery, can help calm down angry feelings. There are books and courses that can teach you relaxation techniques, and once you learn the techniques, you can call upon them in any situation. If you are involved in a relationship where both partners are hot-tempered, it might be a good idea for both of you to learn these techniques.
Some simple steps you can try:
Breathe deeply, from your diaphragm; breathing from your chest won't relax you. Picture your breath coming up from your "gut."
Slowly repeat a calm word or phrase such as "relax," "take it easy." Repeat it to yourself while breathing deeply.
Use imagery; visualize a relaxing experience, from either your memory or your imagination.
Nonstrenuous, slow yoga-like exercises can relax your muscles and make you feel much calmer.
Practice these techniques daily. Learn to use them automatically when you're in a tense situation.
Cognitive Restructuring
Simply put, this means changing the way you think. Angry people tend to curse, swear, or speak in highly colorful terms that reflect their inner thoughts. When you're angry, your thinking can get very exaggerated and overly dramatic. Try replacing these thoughts with more rational ones. For instance, instead of telling yourself, "oh, it's awful, it's terrible, everything's ruined," tell yourself, "it's frustrating, and it's understandable that I'm upset about it, but it's not the end of the world and getting angry is not going to fix it anyhow."
Be careful of words like "never" or "always" when talking about yourself or someone else. "This !&*%@ machine never works," or "you're always forgetting things" are not just inaccurate, they also serve to make you feel that your anger is justified and that there's no way to solve the problem. They also alienate and humiliate people who might otherwise be willing to work with you on a solution.
Remind yourself that getting angry is not going to fix anything, that it won't make you feel better (and may actually make you feel worse).
Logic defeats anger, because anger, even when it's justified, can quickly become irrational. So use cold hard logic on yourself. Remind yourself that the world is "not out to get you," you're just experiencing some of the rough spots of daily life. Do this each time you feel anger getting the best of you, and it'll help you get a more balanced perspective. Angry people tend to demand things: fairness, appreciation, agreement, willingness to do things their way. Everyone wants these things, and we are all hurt and disappointed when we don't get them, but angry people demand them, and when their demands aren't met, their disappointment becomes anger. As part of their cognitive restructuring, angry people need to become aware of their demanding nature and translate their expectations into desires. In other words, saying, "I would like" something is healthier than saying, "I demand" or "I must have" something. When you're unable to get what you want, you will experience the normal reactions—frustration, disappointment, hurt—but not anger. Some angry people use this anger as a way to avoid feeling hurt, but that doesn't mean the hurt goes away.
Problem Solving
Sometimes, our anger and frustration are caused by very real and inescapable problems in our lives. Not all anger is misplaced, and often it's a healthy, natural response to these difficulties. There is also a cultural belief that every problem has a solution, and it adds to our frustration to find out that this isn't always the case. The best attitude to bring to such a situation, then, is not to focus on finding the solution, but rather on how you handle and face the problem.
Make a plan, and check your progress along the way. Resolve to give it your best, but also not to punish yourself if an answer doesn't come right away. If you can approach it with your best intentions and efforts and make a serious attempt to face it head-on, you will be less likely to lose patience and fall into all-or-nothing thinking, even if the problem does not get solved right away.
Better Communication
Angry people tend to jump to—and act on—conclusions, and some of those conclusions can be very inaccurate. The first thing to do if you're in a heated discussion is slow down and think through your responses. Don't say the first thing that comes into your head, but slow down and think carefully about what you want to say. At the same time, listen carefully to what the other person is saying and take your time before answering.
Listen, too, to what is underlying the anger. For instance, you like a certain amount of freedom and personal space, and your "significant other" wants more connection and closeness. If he or she starts complaining about your activities, don't retaliate by painting your partner as a jailer, a warden, or an albatross around your neck.
It's natural to get defensive when you're criticized, but don't fight back. Instead, listen to what's underlying the words: the message that this person might feel neglected and unloved. It may take a lot of patient questioning on your part, and it may require some breathing space, but don't let your anger—or a partner's—let a discussion spin out of control. Keeping your cool can keep the situation from becoming a disastrous one.
Using Humor
"Silly humor" can help defuse rage in a number of ways. For one thing, it can help you get a more balanced perspective. When you get angry and call someone a name or refer to them in some imaginative phrase, stop and picture what that word would literally look like. If you're at work and you think of a coworker as a "dirtbag" or a "single-cell life form," for example, picture a large bag full of dirt (or an amoeba) sitting at your colleague's desk, talking on the phone, going to meetings. Do this whenever a name comes into your head about another person. If you can, draw a picture of what the actual thing might look like. This will take a lot of the edge off your fury; and humor can always be relied on to help unknot a tense situation.
The underlying message of highly angry people, Dr. Deffenbacher says, is "things oughta go my way!" Angry people tend to feel that they are morally right, that any blocking or changing of their plans is an unbearable indignity and that they should NOT have to suffer this way. Maybe other people do, but not them!
When you feel that urge, he suggests, picture yourself as a god or goddess, a supreme ruler, who owns the streets and stores and office space, striding alone and having your way in all situations while others defer to you. The more detail you can get into your imaginary scenes, the more chances you have to realize that maybe you are being unreasonable; you'll also realize how unimportant the things you're angry about really are. There are two cautions in using humor. First, don't try to just "laugh off" your problems; rather, use humor to help yourself face them more constructively. Second, don't give in to harsh, sarcastic humor; that's just another form of unhealthy anger expression.
What these techniques have in common is a refusal to take yourself too seriously. Anger is a serious emotion, but it's often accompanied by ideas that, if examined, can make you laugh.
Changing Your Environment
Sometimes it's our immediate surroundings that give us cause for irritation and fury. Problems and responsibilities can weigh on you and make you feel angry at the "trap" you seem to have fallen into and all the people and things that form that trap.
Give yourself a break. Make sure you have some "personal time" scheduled for times of the day that you know are particularly stressful. One example is the working mother who has a standing rule that when she comes home from work, for the first 15 minutes "nobody talks to Mom unless the house is on fire." After this brief quiet time, she feels better prepared to handle demands from her kids without blowing up at them.
Some Other Tips for Easing Up on Yourself
Timing: If you and your spouse tend to fight when you discuss things at night—perhaps you're tired, or distracted, or maybe it's just habit—try changing the times when you talk about important matters so these talks don't turn into arguments.
Avoidance: If your child's chaotic room makes you furious every time you walk by it, shut the door. Don't make yourself look at what infuriates you. Don't say, "well, my child should clean up the room so I won't have to be angry!" That's not the point. The point is to keep yourself calm.
Finding alternatives: If your daily commute through traffic leaves you in a state of rage and frustration, give yourself a project—learn or map out a different route, one that's less congested or more scenic. Or find another alternative, such as a bus or commuter train.
If you feel that your anger is really out of control, if it is having an impact on your relationships and on important parts of your life, you might consider counseling to learn how to handle it better. A psychologist or other licensed mental health professional can work with you in developing a range of techniques for changing your thinking and your behavior.
When you talk to a prospective therapist, tell her or him that you have problems with anger that you want to work on, and ask about his or her approach to anger management. Make sure this isn't only a course of action designed to "put you in touch with your feelings and express them"—that may be precisely what your problem is. With counseling, psychologists say, a highly angry person can move closer to a middle range of anger in about 8 to 10 weeks, depending on the circumstances and the techniques used.
What About Assertiveness Training?
It's true that angry people need to learn to become assertive (rather than aggressive), but most books and courses on developing assertiveness are aimed at people who don't feel enough anger. These people are more passive and acquiescent than the average person; they tend to let others walk all over them. That isn't something that most angry people do. Still, these books can contain some useful tactics to use in frustrating situations.
Remember, you can't eliminate anger—and it wouldn't be a good idea if you could. In spite of all your efforts, things will happen that will cause you anger; and sometimes it will be justifiable anger. Life will be filled with frustration, pain, loss, and the unpredictable actions of others. You can't change that; but you can change the way you let such events affect you. Controlling your angry responses can keep them from making you even more unhappy in the long run.

Koped from :
http://www.apa.org/topics/anger/control.aspx#

2010-01-28T05:14:00.000+08:00

Cheerleading. A recap.

The ramblings of an emo cheer capt feeling nostalgic about cheer, after its over. Its long.

At first when i took over as captain, i had great ideas for the team, for trainings.

I wanted to schedule trainings at least one month in advance, so people will have ample time to plan around trainings.

I wanted to plan trainings such that there will be a flow, and i know exactly what will happen when, and what parts to train.

Soon however, i realised that both were next to impossible.

Schedules couldn't be planned one month in advance because hall activities were last minute events.

The team consisted of many 'multi purpose' members, who had many other commitments everywhere else.

Trainings couldn't be planned, because a training too rigid in structure, would lose the 'fun-ness' in cheer, instead, bringing it down to a 'train and train and drill and drill' sport, that wasn't anywhere near as popular as the mainstream sports. This would deter people from coming to trainings.

So in the end, i ended up doing what bryan did. I had a vague idea of what we needed to train, kept my options open to stunt suggestions, and decide what to train on the fly, depending on everyone's mood, and suggestions.

At the start, i was worried because there were so little girls, and everyone couldn't commit. Clarissa had exchange and IA, Xinni was damn busy, Elaine busy, YanQin busy.

In the end, we had 5 girls, and used them for every stunt.

Well, we worked with that, it it worked. I'm happy, and grateful all our girls are always the earliest down at trainings.

In the middle, when IH started, and trainings needed to be stepped up, when i realised we were down to 16 people, the bare minimum to qualify for the competition, i was rather saddened. Not enough girls to hit partner stunts, and now, just nice the number of people.

When everyone's commitments came up, and games and meetings and what not took priority over cheer trainings, and most of the time we ended up training with people coming late, leaving early, and having to reteach over and over again. I started to feel a little down.

You see, i had set 2 aims for myself as a captain:

To let everyone enjoy cheer, as much as i did when i was in year one.

To win something in the end.

At that point, it really didn't seem like i was gonna hit either aim.

Around that time, SingYee and WeiJie reminded me that other halls had already started intensive trainings, till late into the night, and they were doing much more then we were then. I went back and thought about it, we were training 2 or 3 hours per session, 2 sessions a week. People were doing 5hrs a session, 4 sessions a week. Even if i were to not compare to other halls, but to last year, we were still training shorter sessions. And the reason for that was the humji security guard that insists that we cut training at 11pm.

In the end, i made the decision to plan as many trainings as i could, all the way up to the competition date. Even if we could not train long per session, as long as we could train many days, one day will bound to have full strength.

Also, i decided not to 'regiment' the trainings, and not to be harsher then i needed to on attendance and performance. To not take the fun away from trainings.

Things went on, and we had cheer camp. Where everyone learnt alot. Also where Zaiton and Bryan helped me tons. I AM DAMN GRATEFUL. :)

After cheer camp, we didn't have much time left. The routine wasn't up, the people were not really confirmed, Elaine and Xinni pulled out of cheer.

IHG got more xiong, people started having more trainings, more matches, more meetings, more commitments.

Everyone started getting very sian at trainings, not wanting to do stunts, disappearing and coming late.

I started getting comments that everyone was in the team, just to make the numbers, and just wanted to get it over and done with.

That cheer is a chore.

Even the people who i thought would be enthu about trainings, wanted trainings to end earlier, and started coming late too.

That really kind of threw me into to the pits of demoralisation.

Not only will we not be able to win anything with the training rates, but it looks like no one is enjoying cheer anymore.

Which means, i really failed as a captain.

I decided to carry on, at least to try to hit my secondary aim, to hit a certain standard so we can go compete without throwing our face.

Morale continued dropping. I was at a loss. I couldn't be too harsh on everyone, as everyone had valid reasons to be tired, to be sian, to be absent. And yet, we were no where near competition standard. It was then Khairi joined us, and injected abit of life into the group. And people like ZhaoQi and Raj told me that they wanted to work harder, to train harder, to achieve something as a team.

I was damn happy at least there were people who cared for the team.

Then as the competition drew nearer, the team started to look like a team. We started asking to go the the routine 'one more time'. To perfect component trainings. However, people were still resting whenever they could, either they were damn tired, or are just at trainings, cause they have to be there.

I was torn between two fractions. People who wanted to train more, and people who wanted trainings to end.

In the end, people started making an obvious effort to come to trainings, started to put cheer as a higher priority.

This was rather heartening. We had a chance.

However, at trainings, i would still be at loss as to what decision would be the best for the team, both morale-wise, and training-wise.

I felt as if one wrong move, and people would just drop out of cheer, or give up and just slack through trainings because they can't quit.

I was still desperately trying to hold on to my primary aim, for everyone to enjoy cheer. The light was faint, a mere speck, flickering, threatening to disappear at any wrong move.

Just one week before competition, trainings were disrupted due to hall events. Which, on hindsight, might have been good. A rest for everyone.

But a blow to our standard. We lost valuable time that could be used to improve our routine.

Then came the competition. We were the last to perform. I was nervous, so was everyone else. I tried to be motivating. I hope it worked. The team looked to be an emo one. There were no cam whores, no loud laughter. Everyone was visibly nervous.

At the actual competition, during our turn, time flashed by, as usual. Stunts didn't go up. Stunts fell. All in a flash.

I was elated it was over.

Then it hit me. We did rather badly. I was supposed to keep the morale up. to tell everyone it was ok. I couldn't do it. I was disappointed in myself.

At the final debrief. I was stunned, amazed, when everyone said they enjoyed cheer, said that they will miss it. And even said that they will join again next year. Looks like my primary aim was achieved. And i had no idea how.

People i thought were definately not going to join cheer the next year, were saying they will join. I have no idea what happenned. Was the competition a key factor?

I have no idea. The sem starts tomorrow. Time to tie up the loose ends of my social portfolio. And to study.

My tour of duty is almost over. Time to find a successor. But how do i not let the flame, which mysteriously flared up, die down?

How? that is the question, which i am sure will come back and nag at me, forcing me to do something to bring the team together again.

Will the job of the captain never end?

2010-01-18T00:25:00.003+08:00

its been 2 months plus since i last updated.

I've neglected this blog.

Neglected my gf.

Neglected my family.

Neglected my studies.

Neglected my friends.

Neglect neglect.

Cheer competition on 27th.

Team still not v good.

Morale is low. And as the capt i'm unable to bring it up. how cui is that.

Music is still not up. 5 more trainings to go.

Social is throwing me tons of shit to do. Just kbed the director. Hope she can zhi dong abit.

Highlights is on tuesday. Hope it doesn't cock up.

Bash on thursday. I forgot to bring in my attire for the stupid 'suit or uniform' theme.

V'day game supposed to start soon. and haven't done the prep for it yet.

I still think angel and mortal won't work for hall.

But they want to try.

Fucking not worth the effort.

I think i'm doing more vday stuff for the hall then i'm doing for my gf.

How fucking cui is that?

ponned 2 lects so far.

haven't done any tuts.

i. want. more. time.

i'm sorry dear. i'll spend more time w u after the dang competition.

Why the fuck am i not enjoying cheer as much as last year? responsibility.

2009-10-31T23:19:00.011+08:00

THANK YOU EVERYONE

haha. its been quite some time since i blogged.

but this is smth rather blogworthy.

my 22nd bday. or rather, the people who celebrated it w me. :)

1st. odac.

dinner at liang court on friday 23rd oct, night.

when everyone was late, as per tradition. hahaha.

ate at an italian restaurant, where we made milo dinosaurs. haha.

chilled out at the river, where i nearly got thrown in. -.-

and where i found out that the bag spencer was carrying, is my bday present.

haha. Thanks for the 'Animal' bag peeps! :)

p.s: ShuJuan was damn high tt night. haha.

2nd. Family

24th oct. sunday.

aunt treated us to a lunch buffet at orchard hotel. freaking full. shiok. haha. got an ang bao from her too. :)

3rd. some hall peeps

24th oct, sunday.

thanks zhihong, ivan, darras, lide, nelson, wenkai, leekwang, kasster, jimmy, vincent, xiaofeng, nat, yiling, lingyi, yinghan for the dinner at ichiban sushi. :)

and the 2 Hershey's pie.

and feeding me the 2 Hershey's pies. haha.

4th. dear, elaine, shiqi, kelvin

29th oct, thursday.

what was supposed to be a dinner w elaine cuz she missed the odac dinner, turned out to be a surprise visit from dearest. :) was stunned when they appeared at my room. haha.

dinner at sakae sushi NTU. and Kelvin sent her home.

5th hall peeps

29th oct, 11+ pm

was doing my work... or trying to, when the gang popped up at the door singing 'happy birthday'. with a bakerzin cake. haha. ok la, they were quite noisy at lide's room, so was kinda expected. haha.

Then.

the whole freaking Baychimo came too. and sang another song for me. haha. :) happy birthday to me again. they gave me a tau pok on my bed, or rather, zhihong's bed. was rather comfortable. LOL.

THEN.

dear walked in with another cake(she actually ran down to amk to get it). O.0

and i tot she went home. so they actually acted out the sending home thingy, and all.

Thanks elaine, shiqi, kelvin, and DEAR!

another surprise. and Happy birthday to me again. :D

too many people, so we went down to the concourse to take photos. and they tried to pole me. haha. kinda weird tho. the pole was the pillar. -.-

the security guard came and kb. so took a photo with him too. haha.

just a few shots then went to hall 2 to find dearest and friends. talked till rather late. dear stayed over at elaine's room.

30th Oct.

Got ANOTHER cake from AMK. and had buffet dinner at Trader's hotel, café biz.

the food was good. slurppp.

I wish i may, i wish i might....

Huge Ass Prawns. of which i had 21.

p.s: i shelled them myself.

Lobsters. which ran out immediately when they came out.

Thanks Dear. :)

Shawn is a happy boy

P.S: did i mention? dear got me a pair of FRED PERRY shoes. :D

P.P.S: Shawn is a damn happy boy. :D

P.P.P.S: Happy 1yr3mnths

2009-09-08T12:42:00.002+08:00

busy times..... again. why?

no more jcrc. but WHY STILL SO MANY THINGS?!

-presentation tmr, which i just found out today

-bday party fri, DnD sat, Rally prep sun

-quizzes in 2 weeks

-trainings starting

-school work like shit. my circuits and electronics lecturer sucks shit.

bah

2009-07-27T21:48:00.000+08:00

K, and buffets.

Had a day of learnign and fun yesterday, as appreciation from the hall.
Visited the Da Vinci exhibit at the science centre.
the place is as interesting as i rmbred it. full of interesting science facts.
and man da vinci is damn zai la. to invent so many things, and do so many things.
definitely wayyyy beyond the average.
science and art, or the science behind art. or....?

paintball afterwords. was kinda fun, but not exceeding expectations tho. haha.
but at least it didn't disappoint.
Sakura buffet for dinner. and as usual singaporeans we gorged ourselves silly.

and dim sum buffet again today. at pine court with my girl.
man i'm freaking fat.
but the dim sum was pretty good.
$19.80++ lunch weekday buffet. around $30/pax.

K-box-ing afterwords, and we sang a few oldies. ahaha. i like oldies man.

check this out.

2009-07-06T22:38:00.002+08:00

reservist, work, rollerbabies

its been awhile since i've updated.

Had the xiong-est reservist ever. almost back to cadet days man.

what happened to slack NSmen?!

And its only the 1st.

Work as usual.

And i got a tutee! for $30/hr sec 2 maths! (good News)

bad news?

Its at redhill, and they insist on only 1 hr per week.

-.- teach what sia.

and check this out. haha.

2009-06-15T14:35:00.001+08:00

www.bored.com

but i'm not complaining.

Been working at a redemption booth for the past few weekends.

Basically sit and use my laptop/read story books.

Usually at united square i could use their powerpoint to power my laptop.

But today i'm at Tampines Mall, and there's no powerpoints in sight.

I will survive.

And this post is cuz i got nth to post about.

Life, will be enjoyed. As much as possible. Before school starts again.

I WANT A TUTEE!!!!!! :D

2009-06-10T17:55:00.002+08:00

anyone wants to share the family pack when snow leopard ships in september?

can share w up to 5 coms :)

2009-06-09T04:36:00.002+08:00

My Macbook.

is now known as the macbook pro 13"! Lol.

OSX Snowleopard is out.

iphone3G S is out. not in sg tho.

iphone OS 3.0 is launched.

Safari 4.0 is launched officially.

I'm tired. But i can't get to sleep.

And the above post is here cuz i got nth to blog about.

2009-06-05T14:02:00.004+08:00

long overdue

an update at last once again. hahaha. i haven't been busy. just lazy.

working weekends at united square. as redemption counter.

reservist in 2 weeks.

slacking away now.

low income. but better the nth. haha.

just celebrated my dear girl's birthday.

rented a car at a discount from shiqi's bf's (kelvin)'s brother. Thanks alot!

and drove around the country (actually was just around town.lol)

Henderson Waves, Marina Barrage, Suntec for dinner. and poof. the whole day is over.

happy. :)

Happy Birthday Dear :)

2009-05-18T01:29:00.003+08:00

I need a job

on the bright side. have been going out w most of my frens.

not all.... yet.

now.

need.

job.

please, hire me.

2009-05-02T14:46:00.003+08:00

exams

are over. finally.

actually they were over last friday. and i've been having fun for the past week. :)

time to catch up on sleep.

and catch up w friends.

and catch up on the things i want to do.

and get a job.

anyone got lobang please jio.

arigato.

2009-04-13T03:05:00.003+08:00

A tribute to my Mom and Dad

I was lying in bed, ready to sleep.

And was thinking about the movie 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button'.

What it symbolizes in terms of being contented, making the best out of what we have, Love: parental or partner.

What it would feel like to be past your best years, and i thought of my parents.

This should be about all parents a generation before us, but as i don't have much personal experience w many other parents, i'll talk about mine.

They are really young parents, 45 now when I'm 22 this year.

But despite their relatively young age (it would be like me giving birth to me, next year), i feel they did a good job bringing my bro and me up.

My dad slogged day and night, as a lorry driver, survived on 3-4 hours of sleep a day, 7 days a week, for more than a decade, since i was born, to provide for the family. To give us a roof over our heads, to put food on the table, and planning ahead to put my bro and me thru university.

How many people our age can do that? It is really, hard earned money that we were spending.

My mom stayed at home as a full time housewife, handling two kids, 2 years apart, since birth. Feeding us, teaching us, cleaning up after us. Waking up in the middle of the night, to sooth our crying. Not losing her temper, even with sleep deprivation, and seemingly ceaseless wants and needs. Not to mention the housework, the clothes, the cooking.

They bought a hdb flat, looking for places which had nursery, kindergarten, primary, and secondary schools nearby. When we grew up a little, my mom had to bring us to school, teach us schoolwork, eve with her not so high level of education. She had to settle our fights, maintain fair treatment between both brothers. She was strict in what we could and could not do, but still gave us freedom. Yet, enough was never enough for kids, and we always wanted more. We argued with her, angered her, scolded her, and she still managed to love us, with no expectations of us repaying her, no appreciation. Everything they did, they did 'for our own good', even though we might not see it that time. Us kids, with our narrow and immature thinking, could never see what 'good' could come out of doing things we did not like. When we were in secondary school, my mom looked after my neighbor's kids for extra income. My dad, meanwhile, continued to work for the dough, with his erratic days and nights due to work.

That might not seem much, but for them to sacrifice the prime of their youth for the family, for the kids. and still always maintaining a strong front for the kids, never quarreling in front of us, no matter how tough life is for them.

Most parents would want their children to be high flyers, achieving this, achieving that, to be this, to be that. Top in class, top in school, top in singapore, get into special stream, get into gifted program etc. Mine however, pushed us, but never expected us to be superkids. We can do what we can do, and if we can do better than expected, its good, but its not a must. There was no pressure from them to achieve results, but to do the best that we can. 对的起自己就好.

They taught us the meaning of hard earned cash, and we know not to spend needlessly. And yet, they taught us not to be stingy too. They never spoilt us, teaching us to be independent, and not take things we have for granted. They never fetched us anywhere, if its not on the way, even when we had a van. They were never our 'chauffeurs'. Not that parents who are 24/7 on call are a bad thing. But it did teach us to be independent. They did the best they could, and showed no double standards, practicing what they preach. Sure, mistakes were made, but we're humans too.

Now that we're relatively grown up, its time to take the load off their shoulders, and bear some of the financial burden. I hope we've turned out well. We may not be the best, in terms of looks, achievement, morals, or whatever, but we try our best.

Even now, my mom wakes up early, or in the middle of the night, to make sure we're not hungry. She buys food back for us, and cakes as treats, from the cake-shop she works at now that she doesn't have to look after us. She happily cooks for us, cleans and packs our rooms, and gives us only the best. My dad helps with the housework, now that he's no longer freelancing, and has off days. He forces me to take money when i buy dinner, or what not. (I think he's secretly happy that we haven't took money from them since we entered army)

All in all, i think my family is a happy one. I thank my parents for being who they are, for bringing us up. I hope that in the future, i can do the same. We can never repay our parents for what they have done for us, and all the money in the world will never be enough to 'repay' them, if we aren't filial. I do hope i will still be so appreciative of them when i'm working, with my own family in the future.

I'm not saying my parents are the best, but they are good enough for me.

Thank you Mee and Dee.

2009-04-12T02:03:00.002+08:00

rash no more

after 2 nights of the rash, i couldn't take it anymore, and went to pay the school doc a visit.

spent 2mins in the doc's office

paid $13.65 for consultation and medication.

and cured me of this stupid 'hong mo'

yay!

Thanks for all the concern everyone.

2009-04-09T08:00:00.003+08:00

wtf is up w this rash?

slept at 3.40, woke up at 7.40. is this meant for me to sleep as little as possible?

freaking itchy, can't think straight.

and it went down after i took a bath. dulan.

2009-04-09T03:34:00.003+08:00

Histamines, rashes, allergies, orgasms, sleep and more

copied wholesale from this website:

http://www.healthmad.com/Conditions-and-Diseases/Allergies-and-Histamine.38749

sheds a bit of light on my current rashes predicament.

Allergies and Histamine
by Christina Boerma, Aug 9, 2007
Allergies can vary from being just a nuisance, bothersome to dangerous. What has histamine to do with it? Did you know this protein does more than trigger allergic reactions?

Important for our body's functioning
Histamine is a hormone/chemical transmitter and important protein that is involved in local immune responses, regulates stomach acid production and acts as a mediator in allergic reactions. This is the bad part we most often read about.

The purpose of Histamine

• Histamine is released as a neurotransmitter, necessary for our brain cells to “communicate” properly. Neurotransmitters are chemicals that are used to relay, amplify and modulate electrical signals between a neuron and other cell.
• Histamine is necessary to modulate sleep
• During an orgasm, histamine is released, and has been connected to the sex flush among women. However, men with high histamine levels may suffer from premature ejaculations.
• Classified schizophrenia patients often have low blood levels of histamine. This can be a side effect of their anti-psychotic medication. When this seemed to be the case, as histamine levels were increased, their health improved.

What causes allergies?
Allergies are caused by an immune response to a normally harmless substance, i.e. pollen or dust. When these come into contact with specific antigens in our blood (part of the white blood cells, so-called mast cells) this triggers a response and histamine is released.
The release of histamine causes several allergic symptoms, for it contributes to an inflammatory response and causes constrictions of smooth muscle.

• The allergic reaction causes blood fluids to enter the area, causing swelling. (Vasoactive).
• The constrictions of the smooth muscle are seen during an asthma attack. The muscles surrounding the airway constrict, causing shortness of breath.

Harmless or life-threatening?
An allergic reaction is an immune response that should not be occurring because the substance that triggers is should not be dangerous to us. Sometimes we have the “luxury” to allow our immune system to run its course, but then we have to sniffle our way through the pollen seasons.
But it can also happen that a harmless looking allergic reaction may develop into a potentially life threatening situation.
Thankfully, nowadays Anti-histamines are widely available and help overcome the body's immunological “mistakes”.
People can be allergic to almost everything - from dust to bee-stings, to certain types of food.
Histamine and food
Histamine and amines (histamine-like substances) can be found in foods or sometimes develop after processing and storage. This happens especially with fermented foods, but sometimes during normal cooking procedures.
Amines are formed from specific amino acids that are present (to a certain agree) in all foods.
The most common food amines are:

• Histamine
• Phenylethylamine
• Serotin
• Tyramine
• Dopamine

Amines can trigger different allergic reactions:

• Vaso-active (affects the width of blood vessels)
• Vaso-dilating (widens the blood vessels)
• Vaso-constricting (narrows the blood vessels)

People can also become allergic to food that doesn't contain histamine; but more often, it's the additives that are the culprits.
“Sensitive” food products are:
Raw egg white, shellfish, strawberries, citrus fruit and pineapple, chocolate, tomatoes, alcohol, fish and pork.
There are many different types of food allergies, with different symptoms.
Symptoms of a food allergy that is histamine related:

• Flushing of the face
• Sweating profusely
• Increased heart rate, palpitations
• Fainting (drop in blood pressure)
• Asthma attack
• Rash, hives, urticaria
• Nausea, vomiting
• Abdominal cramps
• Headaches, migraine attack

People usually react pretty soon, during or after the meal, and untreated, the reaction may last 24-48 hours.
Alcohol and histamine
Alcohol consumption can provide histamine, trigger its release, and prevent a histamine breakdown.
Histamine and alcohol share the alcohol dehydrogenase enzyme during the metabolism stage.
Our body needs histamine - we can't do without it.
But the moment an allergic reaction sets in, it seems to create havoc.

What did I eat wrong?

After experiencing an allergic reaction to a certain type of food, people usually stay away from it.
But sometimes it's difficult to pinpoint what it was that triggered the reaction.
Every new allergic reaction may be stronger than the previous one - and potentially more dangerous.
A specialist is able to do some simple testing - ask your family doctor for a referral. He can also give you a prescription for an anti-histaminicum, just in case.
Mild and fierce
Allergies during pollen season are usually mild, and if you don't mind the running nose and watery eyes, you can sail through without medication.
Food allergies however, are usually sudden and fierce.
Especially the first time it happens can be a frightening experience.
If you only suffer from watery eyes or a rash, you may decide to just wait and see. But in case of difficulty breathing or fainting, it's very important to call a doctor, or to go straight to the first aid department.
Better safe than sorry.

2009-04-08T08:56:00.002+08:00

exams

yet again.

14-04-09 FE1007 Math2

16-04-09 MP8083 Frontiers in Mech Engin

20-04-09 EE8084 Cyber Security

23-04-09 AE2008 Mechanics of Materials

24-04-09 AE2001 Fluid Mech

Relatively slack this sem compared to the last, with 2 unexaminable modules, and 2 50%exam weightage, one which i S/U-ed.

Went to bed at 3.30am.

Woke up at 5am with rashes all over my body.

Too itchy to sleep, so i woke up and read manga.

And now i'm doing revision/blogging.

I will sleep again later.

Study Study Study.

2009-04-02T02:46:00.001+08:00

2 hours 47 mins past

but, enlarge to see.

too me quite some time.

happy 8 months

2009-04-01T20:22:00.000+08:00

ITS

2 MORE WEEKS TO EXAMS!

freak. time passes so fast. and i havent started studying.

urgh

2009-03-31T20:53:00.001+08:00

lens flare

and check out my toenail which has been like this for a mnth. haha

2009-03-24T20:10:00.001+08:00

Motivation

where are u?! i need to start studying man.

Effective comm speech on thurs, MOM test on Friday.

EXAMS IN 3 WEEKS TIME!

bleahhhh.

2009-03-17T23:49:00.002+08:00

Cool Wine

Check this out. What does this look like?

Does it look like a cheap bottle? or a torchlight? or a baton?

BUT NO! ITS AN UMBRELLA! damn cool la. haha.

ok this is quite random.

Exams are in a mnth. urgh.

2009-03-14T14:18:00.002+08:00

am i in the wrong?

something happened today that bothers me.

issit my bad?

the story goes:

we had hall sports day today. so there were a series of random sports games.

like frisbee, handball, dodgeball, etc.

anws, the last game was a waterbomb wargame.

so as usual, with waterbombs, we gotta fill them up 1st.

so as we were all dry and filling up, a fren came and poured some water over me.

as it was just for fun, and we were gonna get wet anws, i just took it as play.

fastforward to the game almost ending.

i spotted that friend mentioned before, standing outside the playing field, and looking at us.

(actually, it was just behind me, as the field is damn small.)

and he was dry.

so i jokingly asked why he was. and tossed a waterbomb at him.

and suay suay, he was holding his handphone.

BUT. the waterbomb didnt hit the phone. it hit his arm, and sprayed abit.

so, he looked at his phone, threw it on the floor(it bounced), and grabbed 4 packs of waterbombs and smacked me, cursing and swearing.

then he picked up the phone,went to one corner, and sulked with a 'f***ed up face'.

and the phone can't be switched on.

Seeing that we were friends, and knowing that he is always damn angsty, i decided to apologise to him, and offered to pay for a new phone (even tho it was probably the throw that spoilt it).

but anws, he just ignored me. and the rest of the people who went up to him as well.

Until now, i still do not think that it is my fault.

and i maintain that if he wants to play, he should be more '玩的起’。

anws, he has a history of flaring up over things like this.

At this moment, i donnue the condition of the phone, but he's still angry.

For friendship, shoul di go and apologise? or should i just give up this kinda friend?

Bloody troublesome.

2009-03-07T03:51:00.002+08:00

time to study

View from Nanyang Chalet 6

random: a lizard dropped on my back as i was drying up from showering.
and i can't stand spoilt brats who brag about it/complain, when others are having it so much worse. grow up..... or maybe not. spoilt kids can be overlooked sometimes. spoilt adults are just unbearable.

2009-02-18T20:40:00.002+08:00

footprints

- make a glider
- design and produce a 4 b5 page brochure
- catch up on all my lects
- catch up on my tuts
- start running
- start looking for pre-exam goodie bag stuff

i'm glad paser olè is over. success! :)

2009-02-15T00:02:00.007+08:00

14th Feb '09

We went for dinner at: Curry Flavour, Novena Square
Its a restaurant selling jap curry tucked in a corner on the 3rd floor.
Its kinda dark, so u gotta be looking out for it to find it.
You can either go Alà Cartè, or Alà Cartè Buffet.
We had the buffet, $25++. Very worth it.
Drinks and such are included.So free flow.
Food was not bad, Service not very good, as it was full house, so they kept forgetting our orders,a nd giving us the wrong stuff. The staff was polite though. and if it matters,i think they were all Filipinos. :)

Eating our Chawamushi. Not bad, but not very good.

The Buffet Menu. :)

The Unagi, which we had 3 sets. :D

We had almost everything on the menu, and of course the best dish were the curries. Good. But too much and u can get sick of it. The Cheese Chicken Katsu was ownage. damn nice, for those who like cheese.

The dessert was Mochi Ice cream. I don't really like Sesame, so i din really enjoy it. haha.
Anws, thats it for dinner. We never made it to Marina Barrage. haha. Bus took freaking long to come we gave up. :p

My Dear Yvonne turned this ˆ(look up) into this(look down)

A Scrapbook made from scratch. :)

THANK YOU DEAR! :)
i donnue where else i'm gonna find someone like u

And when i gotta make book 2, i'm gonna have a hard time meeting this standard. haha.

2009-01-20T17:02:00.003+08:00

Cobwebs

Thats pretty much the condition of my blog now.
I'm so NOT running JCRC next year. Not even if they kill me.
No time for studies, no time for family, no time for friends, no time for girlfriend.Sorry. :'(

SUCKS.

anws, i just cleaned my rooms. At home and in hall.
So no more cobwebs in hall anymore. shiokkkk.

Feb11.Joint hall bazaar.
i hope we don't screw it up, considering the minimal effort put into it. haha.

waterpolo training is stepping up. and i'm skipping almost all of it.Stupid bazaar.
i hope they don't have to field me, with my standard.

CNY goodies canvassing for my hall almost done.acceptable profits.
Cheerleading over. 4th. Stunned.

Till next time! hope i'll be able to update more frequently.

2008-12-22T01:59:00.003+08:00

no time no time!

so busy with so many things. urgh.
anws, here's a nice movie coming up.

'Wolverine' Teaser Trailer @ Yahoo! Video

Wolverine origins.

Odac christmas dinner!

Anyone wants manhattan credit card for students? free entry to zouk, phuture and velvet.
free 1 year.
contact me now!

Cya!

2008-12-06T00:55:00.002+08:00

over?

...or not?
exams are finally over, and no more stressing over studies.
but i don't seem to be relaxing, at all.
everyday is so busy.
i still gotta plan my time.
still gotta dig time out to spend w my gf.
still gotta rush stuff to hit deadlines.
all the meetings, jcrc, joint hall, and ih training have all started.
I WANNA RELAC ONE CORNER CHILL OUT!
why cannotttttt?!!!!!

ps: i'm tempted to photoshop that dell away with an apple. haha

2008-11-22T02:25:00.002+08:00

Beverly Hills Chihuahua

a totally kiddish show. and i watched it.
but i'm not regretting it. :p
cuz i caught it w my gf. haha.
man tt was wayyy mushy.

anws, long time ago song, but i heard it in the movie, and i like it.

for those still having exams, jiayou man!
for those studying for the exams. jiayou too.
for those who finished, congrats.
haha.

crap man. i can't believe i'm missing edmund's party for the jcrc meeting. urgh. sucks.

Hero - Enrique Iglesias

2008-11-06T04:05:00.003+08:00

Happy slip, again. :)

Here's another song by happy slip.
Edited from 'take a bow' by Rihanna
but i think this version is quite nice.

awwwww.

LOL.

enjoy.. i hope.

and here's the rihanna version

Take A Bow -

2008-11-02T02:42:00.003+08:00

Happy birthday to me... again

Had a nice lil dinner at Mahattan FIsh Market at Clarke Quay on friday.
Always wanted to try out the food there.
Not exceptionally nice, but not bad either. haha.
10% off with DBS/POSB cards. lol.

Dear got me a huge brownie cake from Mrs Fields.
that reminds me, i didn't eat my cake that day at my party. haha.

anws, it was damn nice. haha.

Nice Big Brownie Cake

Making my wish again. (its the same one)

Happy birthday to me again.
21. legally of age. time to be a lil' bit more mature.
but hey. what u see ain't always what's gg on inside yea. ;)

And happy anniversary :)

2008-10-28T02:47:00.009+08:00

THANK YOU ALL(edited)

for making my 21st bday party such a nice one.
just by turning up u've alrdy made my day. :)
and more thanks to those who stayed. :D

and thanks to my parents who booked the place, settled the relatives and the catering.

And MAJOR THANKS! to the ODACians who came early to deco the place up abit. and stayed as late as they possibly could dispite the exams and tests. who stuck to the theme. who 'swimming pool-ed' me. hahaha. :D

last of all, thanks to my girlfriend, Yvonne. who stuck by me thru all the mess even with all the butterflies in her stomach. and for taking care of me when i puked. when i was supposed to be taking care of her. :p

Now that the thanks are over, on to the pictures of the presents. :DD

Converse Tee from my aunt which looks large, but actually can fit me. haha.
AND she also gave an angbao.which i suspect is rather fat. haha.

A bracelet from TAKA jewelery from another aunt.

Green Adidas Jacket from the Sec Sch frens.
junjie,mingwei,renkun,yongba,chinglee,leon,jeremy

3 mushy birthday cards/letters from keewei, my buddy. hahaha.

A Western Digital 320GB ext HDD from Guoxi,Bamboo,Daryl.
They gave me a brick to go along with it. And holy shiet the hard disc is really damn light.
Thanks guys!

A Reebok polo tee from Bryan and SinYee. :D
U know, somehow i keep thinking of a wedding invitation when i type your names. lol.

A Pull and Bear laptop sleeve from my platoon. :)
Must have cost a bomb for u guys man. thanks lots!

A personalised wood pen from Sera. Arigato!

AAANNNDDDD
They got me a FRIDGE for a present. so now there's a fridge in my room.
haha. shiok.
now the problem is, shld i start using it now? cuz it;ll be $80 for a mnth if i start now.
but if i start next sem. it'll be $80 for a sem.
bleahhhh.

And this is from:
Zhihong,Wenkai,LeeKwang,Ivan,Darras,Vincent,Amy,XinMiao,ZhenYan
Thanks ya'all!

This space is reserved for the present that will come from my neighbours in hall and the random people.
hahahaha. :p

A Picard Wallet from some of my Hall OG peeps.
WeiAn,Angie,Chris,Waiji

a Crumpler Laptop Sleeve from the rest of the Hera Peeps.
Nicholas.... and the rest. i donnue who exactly. hahaa

A Fossil Watch from the JCRC peeps.
XinNi,PeiWen,PohShen,Zann,JingLun,Eddie... and the rest. Who i donnue who shared either.haha
Sadly, the face is scratched. But i seriously don't rmbr hitting, rubbing against anythign with it. :(

A Topman Cardigan, Grey Skinny Jeans, Pedro Sexy Loafers, Proj. Blood Bros. Laptop Sleeve, and a customised pic collage and letter from ODAC. ODAC rawks. Seriously.

And my last and fav present. A hand cross-stitched pillow from my gf. And a wallet whihc i've been using for a week alr.haha. Thanks a million dear. :)

If u noticed i've got 3 laptop sleeves and 2 wallets. hahaha. Shiok. i love all my presents. I know everyone did put thought into buying/getting the presents. And its damn hard to think of presents. And not to mention there are so many birthdays in oct everyone's pockets shld be super stressed now. And still taking time off(even if its just b4 the party), to get the present when tests are next week, and exams are like HERE. and all of u rawk man. haha. :)

For all the frens whom i din invite, i'm really sorry. I wanted to invite every single one of u buggers out there. but due to budget constraints. i had to censor. haha. don't worry, you are still my friend and not forgotten. :)

This post shall be updated again. I hope. :D.
time to study for my 2 tests.

2008-10-23T20:09:00.002+08:00

busy busy

so many things to do, and the exams are around the corner!
- joint hall bazaar(Stage manager proposal by next tuesday)
-my bday
-canvassing on sat
-trasport for all the sponsership stuff(this friday and next thursday, my birthday! wtf)
-2 tests next friday
-jersey enquiries for a cca
-exams in 3 weeks

Save me!

2008-10-22T13:26:00.004+08:00

Updates!

alrights, as promised, i'm updating, and hopefully it'll be often. :)

first up, i got my new macbook! HAPPYYY!!!

It arrived in a brown box. I actually went back home to wait for it ok! lucky it came not long after i reached home. :P

Opening the brown box to find a white box inside.

And here is the white box. not much bigger than the actual macbook itself.

Another shot of the box

And Tada! the MACBOOK! Made from one block of aluminum! made it so damn ex. kns.

Here's the charger and stuff. Actually no more stuff. just the charger.

Everything Mac, and Everything Else

Actually it looks damn good with the glass screen and the aluminium finish ahhhh.

The chicklet keyboard which i'm still getting used to. I need to learn touch typing.

And last but the most impt, My hand-cross-stiched pillow from Yvonne. Thanks Dear!

Now i got smth to hug to sleep every night. :D YAY!

Thats all for the current round of updates. :)
Stay tuned for more. i should be updating every week or more. :D

2008-10-22T00:20:00.001+08:00

MACBOOK

i got my new laptop at last. shiokkk.
i'll be updating, at last. about stuff.
after i upload the pics to the new lappy.

stay tuned. :)

2008-10-02T22:47:00.004+08:00

feels wayyy longer than it actually is.

and i'm glad. :)

thank you for loving me.

Happy anniversary Dear.

Lol. :P

P.S: I love you

2008-09-29T02:34:00.002+08:00

mamma mia

Just caught the movie just now. Nice nice. :)

Dancing Queen
"Dancing Queen" March Thru Island - Mamma Mia! Clip - Universal Pictures

Honey Honey

2008-09-23T01:35:00.003+08:00

juggling

i hope i don't drop anything.

sorry for the lack of updates.

i'll update more when i get my laptop.

things that happenned.

-spencer's bday

-wing's bday

-hen's bday

happy birthday all!

2008-08-20T22:04:00.000+08:00

busy

busy busy, no time to update.
time to study. hard. die laaaaaa....

2008-08-10T12:52:00.003+08:00

updates!

it has been a busy busy month.
sports camp was fun and xiong.
i would like a more enthu og tho. but u take what you get. ;D
i had fun.

Hall camp was fun fun and slack. haha.
the pple were nice and enthu. so yea tts what made up the fun-ness.

hall life.... is smth you can't go w/o experiencing in uni.
suppers and drinking and weird games and HTHTs at night.
the things you find out abt yourself and others that you would nvr have guessed at.
the slack hours btw lessons, can be spent napping on my bed. shiok.

now to think about remaining in hall next year.
JCRC is probably the way to go. but the commitment will prob kill me.
my juggling skills. are gonna improve alot.
oh. that is providing i get in. i ain't Mr. Popular.
not to mention studies. ahhhh.

sports bash 120808
hall one night stand 130808
nbs bash 160808
sports dnd 230808... i think
hall dnd 300808

2008-08-06T14:52:00.002+08:00

010808

this is to the girl who,

lost so much sleep for me.

got me a crumpler laptop bag.

bought me so many things.

is always on my mind.

worried so much she cried herself dry when i went mia in m'sia.

is so understanding about every cock thing i say or do.

loves me more than i love myself,

dispite me being such an ass at times.

words just simply can't discribe.

i love you dear.

Guys, meet my girlfriend, Yvonne. ;)

2008-07-21T00:58:00.004+08:00

Sports unlimited 15

I'll be gone for 1 week. sports camp. then another week. hall 6 camp.

to you:

Anytime that we find ourselves apart
Just close your eyes
And you'll be here with me
Just look to your heart
And that's where I'll be
If you just close your eyes
Till your drifting away
You'll never be too far from me
If you close your eyes

i'll be missing you.

2008-07-17T15:21:00.005+08:00

Updates!

Met up w the odacians after work on friday to welcome back joseph and huiling.Thai Express is damn ex, and damn lil. but ok la. it din taste too bad. haha.

Went malaysia on saturday w the colleagues. and Mike's house is freaking huge.

and he got a rather cute dog. haha.
Sorry for making you so worried. :(

AND! I got crumpler part and parcel laptop bag for school!
Its nice. and i'm not gonna listen to any negative conmments on it. haha. ;P
Arigato.
it was the shortest time i've spent in a store b4 walking out with smth so ex too. haha.
its big and its comfy and hopefully i can fit my laptop in.
just too bad i'm small.haha
alright i'm rushing off for a movie. hence the short post.

2008-07-10T00:24:00.015+08:00

Singapore Flyer

Settled the insurance thingy in the morning. and
Took the Singapore Flyer yesterday, for the 1st time.
Its a seriously damn big ferris wheel.
We got on at 7pm. which was supposedly a good time, as we can see the tran between light and dark. basically meaning we could see the sunset. but alas. it was too cloudy to see the sun dissappear.

the brochures

on the way up, before we got out of the platform.

and our 1st sight was... Bangala workers doing up plants.

lol.

Before we got very high up.

Above the flyover.the city skyline.

the floating platform, where we pioneered NDp07. now its alr NDP08. so fast.

Esplanade in the distance.

Footprints.

The soon to arrive IR.

The Dam they're builing to turn the place into a resevoir.

Nearing the top.

Cloudy.

The F1 racetrack, with people training for the Standchart marathon.

Dark. so suddenly

The flyer in red.

Meeting up with the odacians tmr for Josephcmi's dinner. haha. ;)

2008-07-08T01:58:00.004+08:00

Accident

met an accident in Xiao Bai.
on saturday, during work at compasspoint, my manager passed me the keys, and said 'thanks'.
so he was gg drinking again.
just out of the freaking compasspoint.

So this is the rough sketch of the whole thing. i was going on the straight road. and there was a few cars parked on the left. so i was being cautious. drove at only 40km/h there abts.

and i saw a van, kangoo, inching out when i was just behind it. and obviously i horned. and he freaking kept coming out. so i braked and swerved to the right, and nearly hit the divider. and he still kept comign out. and 'KEEEMPP, EEEEKEMP KEMP KEMP EEE' tio the whole left side with a few dents. ho seh liao.

heng i nvr braked harder earlier. with xiao bai's brakes, and the close proximity, i wld have hit him on his side instead. and it wld have been my fault. bloody bugger.

Anws, after tt we parked at the side and had a discussion. and his dad came in a mercs. and my boss came on foot. his dad inspected the side of xiao bai and went 'how much wld this cost?' to which my manager casually replied '$200 ba i guess'. and the old man flared up. 'KNN CCB &*%^&%^&*%^&$%^' and went on abt how ex it was and stuf and tt it was my fault. cuz we parked like this:

So his dad assumed i cut his son to turn. KNS. nvr figure out story come kbkb. so in the end they had a shoutign match. and my manager showed his ah beng background. lol.

Conclusion: both claim insurance. which i'm gonna do tmr morning. on my off day. and chiong off to town.

Pics of xiao bai below.

the small white 600cc panda van. lol.

And here's a clip of bam drifting on NFSU2. not pro material, and doesn't look as good captured.but he's really damn zai by my standards alr. so here's a vid. haha

2008-07-05T01:46:00.003+08:00

school's starting

and i'm ending work. so fast.
and i got no mood to work now. haha. super slack.
apprehension and anticipation. tts how i'm seeing the pending uni life.

for more recent updates,
just watched a very last min hancock with joseph and spencer.
joseph back from taiwan, and spencer about to go bangkok.

Expected it to be a nice movie...
and it turned out better than expected :)
nice idea, nice storyline with a nice plot.
i think it would be nice if it was written into a book. expanding on more of the side plots which were just touch and go.
i would recommand it to most people. but if its not ur taste don't come looking for me! :)

another youtube vid. part of the 6 songs collide by the norwegian recycling group.
i'm yours

here's the Happyslip version.

Here's the Happyslip version. lol

cheers!
hope i get into sports camp and hall2.
oh.and i've 80%decided on a macbookpro. :)
slurge.

2008-07-01T21:40:00.004+08:00

tire change

drove Xiao Bai on friday after work, cuz 'boss' hadta go for a wedding dinner. and expected him to get drunk.

Nah, thats not xiao bai, no matter how much i want it to be. Xiao bai is below.

Everyone squeezing inthe back. haha

With me and Shiqi sitting in front. Damn heavy damn hard to drive can. 600cc van carrying 7 people.

Anws, after going to clarke quay and walking arnd in 'eiao' attire, drove to kovan for supper. and the prata guy totally didn't get our orders. kns.

after sending everyone home, and on my way home, the van cldn't go very fast. and started drifting to the left. and i heard a 'thum thum thum' sound which increased in frequency according to the speed i went. so i was thinking shit, maybe exhaust drop or smth. stopped the van at went down to check. KNS. left back tire puncture! ARGHHHH. got so suay anot. just when i was so damn tired somemore. so proceeded to call my 'boss' and changed the tire. took a good 30-45 min. was too shagged out and pissed off to take any pics, hence the lack of it.

But, it was a good experience, and yea, now i got the general idea on how to change tire. the last one i changed was the tire of the Comet. with 10 freaking bolts, compared to Xiao Bai's 4. hahaa.

Went to work as usual the next day. Late in fetching 'boss' from swisshotel due to the multiple jams on CTE. and was damn worried the wheel will come off, or the fuel tank will run dry. i was running on EMPTY since the night before. haha.

on a last note, anyone has a good nice value for money laptop to recommand. or any to blacklist?

Short clip of the cableski

2008-06-29T01:28:00.004+08:00

cableski

again. at batam cable-ski park.

this time with the Odacians.

My 2nd time there. shiokk. and i got super sunburnt.

skin peeling off my face alr.

improved from the last time i went. could do some small hops.
changed to the 'booted' board instead of the slippers one.
and the boar di used had fins, easier to go straight. but when i tried to do a 360, they slammed me face down into the water. damn pain. haha.
and don't worry guys, most people take one day to learn how to stand up.

some pics!

Us after boarding and the girls washed up. Note all the guys trying to 'gek'. ahhaha. We haven't mastered the art of gek-ing and smiling Hendric.

Us with some fo the people we met there.

sales target hjit yay.

hai.

2008-06-19T18:38:00.002+08:00

Rest And Relax

shiok off day. slept for 10 hours. ahhhhh.

chill abit and a relaxing 10 laps swim.

rest and relax. i need this once a week man.haha.

courtesy of huiling and her boredom. what we learn from history.

YAY! hopefully i'm gonna cableski again!

2008-06-18T00:41:00.002+08:00

What happenned?!

Ok that was a lame title.

Caught The Happening today.

I din watch The Village, by M' Shamuggam or smth. but fromt he comments i heard abt it, the happening is somewhere along tt lines.

The story is basically about plants releasing a chemical tt causes humans to commit sucide.

Not alot can be done plot-wise. so not alot was done.

There were quite a few creative ways to commit sucide tho.

the usual sound/music play with trillers. and sudden 'attacks'

I din really get most of the lines, why they said that, and what it means.

And i din really get the acting either.

Somehow the actors came out as rather expressionless to me.

In all, unless ur a rather deep person who digs the M'Sha-smth-guy's works, don't catch that movie.

In other events, met a primary school friend who happens to be otherwise connected too. wow. what a small world.

Basically thats all for now. I hope i'll hit my target for this month.

2008-06-16T23:20:00.003+08:00

updates again

been another busy week.
had a good PC fair. good sales.
another family chalet.

caught the incredible hulk. it was a change from the previous. more action, less talk.
an equally emo hulk. forever wronged, forever hated, strong on the outside weak on the inside.

caught sex and the city and a belated b'day treat for yvonne too. details can be found here : http://www.fangyean.blogspot.com/

i'm really too lazy to blog for myself sia.hahha. ;P

got the uni matric stuff alr. applied for hall. hope i get into hall 2.
if not, well we'll see how it goes.

2008-06-10T23:50:00.002+08:00

updates

actually nth much to update abt
work work work with cui sales.
my last full mnth of work. uni's satrting soon.
apprehension and anticipation.

going out with diff groups of friends.
sorry i can't say 'yes' to every offer. my parents are starting to breathe down my neck alr. liberal as they are.

i know what i want and what i am willing to do. but do u?

well thats abt all for everything.
updates on kbox and shujuan's b'day can be found on shiqi's blog at http://shikkyscribbles.wordpress.com

thats all folks!

2008-06-01T22:59:00.003+08:00

there are lucky days

and there are unlucky days.

i'm still waiting for my lucky days.

a one week rest after the 3 b'daes in a week, one week of not being at home everynight.

2 more nights out next week. i hope my parents won't be pissed.

i want to go to a beach resort.

i want a car.

i want.

2008-05-27T23:24:00.001+08:00

ni na me ai ta

Grab it before its too late!
but don't do anything rash. ;)
thats what friends are for

2008-05-26T00:14:00.002+08:00

wishlist

updated

2008-05-23T15:42:00.003+08:00

fast updates

-eco x sprint

pictures and descriptions can be found at

- http://www.shikkyscribbles.wordpress.com and http://www.magicdustz.blogspot.com and http://www.airwalker.blogspot.com

-yingguang's birthday treat at Vienna

-all the birthday preparations

-going out everynight

2008-05-23T15:06:00.000+08:00

i love hendric

2008-05-16T00:11:00.004+08:00

love story

koped from daryl's blog.
don't emo alr dude. go out and do smth!
anws, the story is really rather sad.
P.S: if u wrote this, good work, ur zai. AND THINKING WAYY TOO MUCH. ;)

The setting of the sun signaled the close of the day. The long rays struggle to reclaim its hold on buildings its magnificent light once shown on. A boy, barely twenty in existence, stood alone on the steps of the college that served to educate him for two years. 'Rose Annd College for the Arts'. The sunset cast a gloom upon these words, imprinted on the sides of the proud building. The boy took in these images sadly, feeling a clenching in his heart. " She who gave me life, for sake of her own...", he mumbled softly.

The boy recalled the day he came into the college. it was not a feeling of excitement and nervousness that griped the boy on the first day. It was not the college of his choice. Whoever heard of a boy attending a college for the arts. The boy was at an age whereby the image that he projected out mattered heavily to him. For coming to this school for the arts, he had been the butt of jokes for his friends for weeks. All this led to his dread and not so subtle dislike for the college. It was then that he met her.

It wasn't that she was drop dead gorgeous. Sure she was attractive but no the sort that made heads turn in a dinner party. Perhaps it was her eyes, intense and yet projecting an aura of innocence at the same time. Perhaps it was the way her lips turned up whenever she smiled that completed the sweetness that was her. She was lightly tanned but her cheeks glowed a healthy pink, highlighting her youth. Her hair flowed a lustrous black that showcased her chinese roots. The boy was enthralled by her at first sight.

But yet there was a slight problem here. A girl of her attractiveness would capture boys' attention like honey to bees. If the boy had been alittle more enthusiastic and attended the orientation party held before the start of school, he mihgt have had a greater chance of getting together with her. As it was, the girl attracted the desire of another boy who succeeded in being together with her.

The boy kicked himiself for this oversight. You can safely say that from then on, his attitude to school changed tremendously. Every minute in school was a minute breathing the same air, sharing the same compound as her. He appealed frantically to change his subject combination in order to be in the same class as her. Half his wish was granted when he managed to get the same combination but imagine his horror when he realised there were four similar classes with the same combination. He got into the class right next to hers. His frustration was slightly appeased by the thought that he was one step closer to her.

Now one thing that has to be noted was that the girl had an extremely close girl pal that is very important to the story. This pal of hers was pretty decent looking, although she was not as attractive as the girl. Boys did not exactly flock to her but that could have been partly because being with the girl, she was frequently overshadowed by the loud charisma that the girl exuded. However, she had never complained nor rebeled against this arrangement and was perfecty contended at being in the shawdoes of the girl. She cared for the girl genuinely with all her heart and set her will at being the girl's strength and support. If one were to look closely, one would realised that what she lacked in her appearance, she made up for it with quiet strength and maturity. Because the girl was with her half of the time, (the other half being with her boyfriend), the boy realised that he had to get close to the girl's pal if he wanted to get an even chance at chasing the girl.

When he mentioned to the girl's pal on his infactuation with the girl and whether she could help, she actually couldn't help giggling in his face. This was a position she had been in countless times when boys approach her for help over the girl. She had gradually learnt that laughing outright would nomrlally insult a boy to the extent that they would leave her alone. So far, only two boys had passed this test of hers. The first was the girl's current boyfriend who had arrogantly stood there smirking. The second was the boy himself who stood his ground defiantly. The girl's pal stopped her fake giggling and looked at the boy's resolute, determined gaze. She agreed to help him.

Actually, another reason for this agreement was the thought that the girl's boyfriend had not actually been so great for her. The girl had started to stay out late into the night, drinking and smoking. The boyfriend's arrogance had started to have its mark on the girl as she stubbornly refused to listen to any negative comments about her boyfriend. Perhaps this boy that seemed so sincere and ernest could help wake the girl from the nightmare that she had gotten herself into.

It helped that the boy was funny and charming. He hanged out with the both of them on the pretense that he was a good friend of the girl's pal. Joining them for meals, study sessions, the boy gradually forged his place into the clique. He knew that surely he would have a breakthrough soon.

The breakthrough came sooner than her expected. A phone message from the girl urgently requested him to meet her at their usual haunt in school. The fact that lessons were still on did not deter the boy. Seizing his opportunity, he sneaked out of class to meet the girl. He found her, eyes puffy like a blowfish, a side of her that was so fragile and yet had appeared to be so captivating. Instinct guided what his guts failed to do for so long, he kept her in his arms and sooth her weeping form with kind and warm whispers. Gradually, her eyes that rained tears of heartbreak looked at him first with confusinon, then comprehension, and it turned into sparks of longing. She returned his embrace and as the sparks turned to flames, they shared their first kiss, reeking with the innocence of adolescence love. That was the story for how the boy got into the heart of the girl.

However, we must examine the cause of the girl's misery. Early in the morning, a message from the girl's pal informed her that her boyfriend was spotted with a girl in an empty classroom. She responded by calling and scolding her pal, but deep down, she felt a dread that we usually feel when we know that something that we did not want occuring had already happened. Her suspicion overcoming her trust in the relationship, she proceeded to check the classroom that her pal mentioned about.

Creeping along the classroom block, she suddenly had a wild thought that she was appearing suspicious. She stood up and thought angrily, ' If someone needs to hide, its definitely not me. Why would i be doing the hiding?' No sooner had she stood up when she spotted her boyfriend alone in the classroom. She was on the verge of heaving a sigh and calling out to her boyfriend when she observed the female form he was holding. Suddenly, a wave of nasea hit her as she struggled to contain a sob. Choking back the teares that called for release, she ran away from the hurtful scene.

If there was a blessing in the whole saga, it must tsurely be directed at the girl. Ridding herself of the bad influence that was her boyfriend, she found the boy a refreshing breathe of freedom. They encouraged each other on, both being each others' pillar of support. They explored places, no place boring because of their mutual company. That period coincided with summer for that year, a summer that the boy reckoned was the best in his life.

Yet, it was not a summer that was delightful for all concerned. With the growing of the relationship for the new couple, the extra privacy they sought put a strain on their friendship with the girl's pal. What thye gained in time together, the pal gained in loneliness. Yet, as great friends came along, the pal understood the need for the new couple to bond as soulmates and the possibility that she may hinder them. She was as noble a friend as they made them.

And yet summer must end and th epassing of summer gave birth to autumn. Yet with the cold, heartless wind of autumn came bad news. The country was entering a war with the neighbouring country and with it, the call for able bodied male citizens. Youth were robbed of their opportunity to study and enlisted into the army to rfight for the nation. This thus began the lengthy separation between the boy and the girl.

War is said to be a battle of boys in uniform, put there by the folly of old men in suits. The war raged long and wild. Youth and innocence were thrown out the window as the boys were trained to be killing machines. They were separated from the lives of a student, ideals and dreams crushed as all that loomed was a daily fight to be able to see the sunrise for another day. Many harden their hearts and minds to withstand the physical and mental onslaught on themselves, losin gtheir own identity and ultiomately themselves. Those that did not do so often broke down psychologically, becoming a hazard to themselves and others.

This was a reality that the boy found himself in. Visions of a safe future coupled with an overwhelming lonnging to see the girl fueled the energy that kept him going. Through the long marches and the cold nights, what kept the boy going, kept the boy sane was the letters of love that he frequently received. The letters sent warmth from the girl that helped preserve the boy through the harsh winter months.

At this point, the girl had moved abroad to excape the war. The government had seen no point in causing a whole generation to give up their lives and thus had encouraged females to continue their studies abroad. The girl went with her pal to continue their studies.

At this point, you may want to find out what had happened to the girl's ex-boyfriend. His parents subscribed to the idea that 'good metal was not used to make nails'. Thus he went the way of the girls, onward to a dainty lifestyle whereby the war was a thing on the newspaper, read in the morning over a cup of capuccino.

And as the war raged on with no end in sight, there occured this demoralising moment for the boy. Letters went but it was as if the carrier pigeons were shot on their way to their detinations;none came back from his love. The days ran into the weeks , and onwards to the months. The will to fihgt ebbed to a standstill. Whatever had happened to the girl? Had she a new love? Had she forgotten his existence? Or had she met with an accident? These thoughts wrecked the mind of the boy and gnawed at him from the inside. The fatigue was unbearable.

Yet, as quick as the letters were gone, it resumed one day. They explained that the post office had been bombed and no letteres could be sent out during that duration. The spirit of the boy rosed at this, his purpose in survival restored again. Thoughts of allowing the war to end his life were vanquished as he persevered to see the end game of it.

And so, 3 years after the start of the war, it ended. Soldiers, exhilarated at seeing the light at the end of the deadly tunnel, stepped from the battlefield back into the society they fought for. Many had no idea how to regain their lives; loved ones whose presence for years were in the letters received, now took on human form and many had no ide ahow to itneract with them. Children were now youth and fatheres had no idea what to talk about with their sons. For the boy though, a different reality awaited him.

Fully expecting the girl to be waiting for him at the airbase, he was understandably disappointed when he saw only his family at the airport. His family though, had news regarding his loved one; she had contacted them during the war to tell them their status as a couple, and had supported each other during the war. However, the night tthat the news of the end of the war was announced, the girl became ill and had to be taken to the hospital. The doctors were shocked that the girl had an advanced stage of cancer. Within the week, she had returned to heavens embrace.

The boy felt unfairness and injustice with a rage. All that he had fought for, all that he had kept himself alive with, all had been cruelly taken away from him. And as the sky teared of its own, the boys's sobs turned into heartwrenching wails of agony that tore at the heartstrings of those present. And yet at this juncture, fate was not done playing her heartless games with him yet.

days in a row, the boy layed at his home. Dreams were spent envisaging the life he would never have. He deprived himself of food and water, for the sake of trying to experience the pain the girl had experienced during her last few moments in life. Courageous on the battlefield, he possesesd none to convince himself to visit the cemetery where the girl lay. Unjustified shame filled his whole being.

And it was like a phantom in the morning to find the girl in his room, appearing as the tentacles of sleep loosened their grip on him. She stared at him with sorry eyes, a pain in them not totally unlike his own. For a fleeting moment, his disoriented self could not determine the realness of the moment. Then, he rushed forward to hug the girl. Even if this was a dream, it was a dream that he was not willing to give up. If it was a dream, all the more he had to cherished every minute, every moment, before it disappeared. It was then that he realised, if it was a dream, why was the girl's ex0boyfriend standing beside her, staring at them?

With confused eyes, he looked upon her, only to see her looking away, not wanting to meet his gaze. A wave of questions directed at her, washed over unanswered. Finally, she spoke softly, a silent whisper of apology, before pushing a letter into his frozen hands. With a final glance, her boyfriend and her turned and walked away from his life.

The boy could not make sense of it all. In a frenzy for the answers to the relentless questions, he found the strength to head to the cemetery whereby the girl was laid to rest. Confusion clouded his every action, every movement as he stumbled through the cemetery. The morning had not passed into the full rays of the sun yet and a gloomy mist derappled over the place. Yet the laziness of the morning did not lessen the intense shock received when the picture on the gravestone sadly showed the smiling face of the girl's pal.

The day grew into a disorientation. The boy stumbled around, unsure of the way his life had turned out to be. Yet, fate was no indecisive lady and her steady hands guided him back to where it all began. The Rose Annd College.

In the years of the war, the glorious college had been reduced to a shadow of its former self. It was abandoned, not in use but it still stood there proudly, refusing to accept the humiliation. Memories stirred within the boy as he stoood at their former haunt, in pain but determined to find an end to it all. The letter that was held in his hand took on the form of a pandoras box. Gently, he extracted the letter from its envelope casing.

"To You,The boy i fell in love with. If you area reading this letter, it would mean that my prayers for your safe return has been answered. However, it would also mean that I am no longer able to see this sight that has been in my dreams every night you have been gone.

As i write this, i am at the last of my strength. I know not what god has in plan but if this were a trade made in heaven for your safe return, i would want it to happen no other way.

For i had fell in love with you, your naivety, your will to put whats wrong to right, to pursue what you want to be yours. I have fell in love with you from the day you beset my assistance to pursue the girl.I loved the way you talked, not with arrogance but humility. And as the infactuation refused to leave my side, i was torn between the self that loved you and the self that loved the girl. Yet to love sombody with all your heart can noly be done if one is able to do what is good for that person. And so, i forced my crying heart to silence and tried to give you the life you wanted.

was me the girl found who was making out with her boyfriend. At that point of time, I knew that was the only way to shatter their relationship which had hindered your way. That was my first time and though i was giving it to someone i found repulsive, it was for the one i loved and it was worth every sacrifice.

And when you two came together, i closed myself away for my heart can only bear so much. I could not stand the thought of you guys being togther, let alone the sight of it. So many times i berated myself for my stupidity, yet deep down, i knew that was the right thing to do for my loved one, you.

And when you left for the war, i feared for you. Every single moment was a moment spent wondering about you, worrying for you. I hated the fact that i was in no position in your life to change your mind on leaving for thw ar. I had this secret fantasy of the both of us running into the night, away from the war and everything. I was naive, i know, but i could not help the way my heart shouted out for you.

I had to be careful whenever i'm with the girl. I could not appear to be in anxiety as i soothed the fears of hers. I was worried to death inside of me, while outside, i remained a pillar of strength for her. At this moment, you may wonder how i could continue to be the support for the girl. In truth, a mild dislike for her had developed when you two got together. What could i do one was my best friend, the other, my love of my life.

And yet, the tiny sparks of dislike was stoked into a gigantic fire when the girl got back with her boyfriend. She had found out that i was the girl that she saw on the faithful day and was adamant that you and i were in cahoots. She stoidly refused my explanations nor my attempts to persude her. And with the revelation of this, the severed bonds between her boyfriend and her were healed and they got together.

I feared for you with all my heart. I feared for the you, out there in the frighterning war, without any love. I did not want you to give up hope, for i know you heart would die if you heard of this news out there in the battlefield. I needed you back, even if not to be by my side, for all i wanted was you to be safe. And so, i mustered all the courage i possessed to approach your family, explaining that i wanted to know how exactly to write to you. And so from then, i took over the letter writing.

I have to say, it feels good to be lvoed by you. Even though i was assuming the identity of the girl, i could feel the love radiating from the letteres you sent. I envied what the girl had all this while, hated her for forgoing the beautiful gift that is you, yet glad for this change of expressing my deepest emotions to you. I felt like an escaped prisoner, tasting the glorious sweetness of freedom. For the first time in my life, i felt truly contended.

Alas, God did not want this contendment to last. When i receiged the news of the deadly disease that lay within me, i could not control the feeling of anger and resentment at this world. Why me? What had i done wrong? Had i not done enough to be with the boy i loved? By this time, the war was going to end and with it, you would return. Have i not the privilege of seeing you for the last time, even if it is from a distance?

But then i remembered, in my prayers for you, i had often asked God to take me isntead if ever death were to descent onto your path. This was an agreemtn, made in heaven and God had fulfilled his side of the deal. I had to fulfill mine too.

I am dreadfully sorry to drape this albatross of a news over your shoulders. I have given up much of my life and as life starts to fail me, i want to be selfish for once. I want my love to know what i have done. I refuse to fade away into emptiness. I want to give yself the chance of gaining your lvoe, if only for an instance. I know not hwat are the feelings that course through you. Please know that i am staking no claim on your life, nor you. I do not know if you will resent me for this letter. If any, please treat this like the rantings of a dying mind, illusions playing on her fading mind.

Lastly, please do not pity me. All that i have done, i have done it because i want to do so. Nothing has pushed my hands, nor influenced my mind other than the love for you. And i have loved with all my heart and soul and that is not something that everybody has the privilege to experience. Do not burden yourself with a love for a dying girl. If i could remain as a memory in your heart, that would be more than i could want for. Thanks for bringing purpose and colour to my life. Wherever i am when you read this letter, i will continue to watch over you, to love with all my heart. I will always love you"

Tears flowed unashamedly down the eyes of the boy. Here was a girl, who loved him more than he did himself, who did things for him without asking for any in return, an unconditonal love. And all through his life, as he was waiting for love from the front door, he had not the luck nor the eyes to see the love that had been by his side. A love that had given him fulfillment, given him strength, and lastly had given him life. And as his wails echoed through the empty building, the first snowflakes starting to fall silently from the sky. Here was winter and with its coming, it signaled the end of this story. A story of a boy, and a love he can never have.

2008-05-13T23:54:00.007+08:00

busy days

bought a nice zai portable speaker at suntec for just $5 (original price $35)

thanks to the kind girl at the next stall.

its really not bad, loud for its size.

Bam's new oakleys. i know what i want for my 21st alr.

the Juliet cyclops wore in the movie.haha.

Anws, the past week was rather hectic.
last tuesday k-ed with the guys. i suck. (2 hrs sleep)

wed daryl's hse. (4 hrs sleep)

sat night k-ed with colleagues. pics below. 1.5 bottles of martell. my 1st time drinkign martell. not as bad as i tot it wld be. and turned out my colleagues were not v good drinkers. and they drink often somemore. lousy. haha (2 hrs sleep)

sun night chalet for kw's bdae. (1 hr sleep)

monday night sleep. at last. 9 hours. shiokkk.

and tmr night k again.my singing still sucks.beware.

p.s: i donnuw why the pics are sideways, they look alright in the folder.

bugger blogger. don't let me upload. den now like tt.

2008-05-07T13:17:00.002+08:00

Bad Days

things started on monday.
ntu med screening in the morn, after which i headed to office in macpherson.
tried to see if there were any buses from boon lay to macpherson.
decided there weren't, and took the train all the way to toa payoh followed by a change of buses. journey took around 1.75 hrs.
And when i reached office i realised that there was indeed a DIRECT bus from boon lay. Urgh.

Chionged my office work, and left for tuition at 3pm, deciding to take my boss's van. and found out there was a FREAKING JB VAN parked behind the van, blocking me from coming out. that was followed by some waiting and seaching for the owner of the car parked beside so i could manuveur out. by the time i left the carpark, it was 3.30pm. the time tuition was supposed to start.

and it got worse. drove to tutee's place, and realised that the road into her house wasn't where i usually walked in. ended up driving around for another hour trying to find the correct entry. so much so until i'm pretty much familar witht he serangoon, kovan, and hougang ave 2, 5, 7 areas.
urgh.waste petrol. and tuition got cancelled in the end.

drove back to office to chiong the rest of the work, and met the guys for gym at toa payoh. ended up late again. haii.

Tuesday, had a haircut at Twister, and ended up with a rather screwed up one. what a waste of $20. oh wells, i'll just go back to my old hairdresser.
cheaper and suits my style. urgh. i wonder how long it'll take to grow back. (not to mention no sales at all at Signature park, Expo)

Wednesday, here i am now at Suntec, hidden in some ulu corner, with no sales too! yay. what joy. (note the scarcasm)

2008-04-30T11:59:00.004+08:00

Final Fantasy 7 Series

i just finished playing Final Fantasy 7 Crisis Core last night.

Its damn good. serious.

it was more like watching a movie than playing a game. but because it is a game, u interact with it alot. in all, its wayyy better than watching a movie or just playing a game. for those with a psp i would definately suggest u play. and watch Final Fantasy : Advent Children too. if not for the storyline, just watch it for its CGI graphics.

Now i'm trying to find Final Fantasy 7 'old school'. With Cloud as the main character, on the psp platform. anyone knows any mods or homebrew that allows me to do that? like a PSX emulator and rom tt works on the psp fat custom firmware 3.2 i think.some old one that was out b4 the slim came out.yeps

Btw, for those who don't know, the timeline for the series goes as such: Crisis Core(PSP), Final Fantasy 7(PS1), Advent Children(Movie)

The storyline is seriously the best i've seen in a game. Well developed and not too long and exhausting. leaves u wanting to know more about the story, for those who never played the old school FF7(like me).

Some cutscenes i found from You-tube below.

Final Fantasy 7 For PS3

Final Fantasy 7: Crisis Core for PSP ending scene. SUPER NICE!

Angeal, Sephiroth, and Genesis fight in Crisis Core

Time to start Crisis Core on hard mode, until someone sends me the ps1 version on psp. haha.

2008-04-26T23:19:00.005+08:00

S11 - $

i just realised!
if u combine S11 (the kopitiam we always eat at)
u get $!
haha. ok random as ed discribed.
i hope S11 doesn't come and sue me or anything.
no slander or defamation intended!

2008-04-26T01:20:00.002+08:00

Climbing

man i totally miss climbing.

i hope i haven't lost my touch.
i wonder when will the next time odac climbs together again be.

2008-04-18T22:34:00.002+08:00

Smile

'Cause u look great when u do.

(not to mention it may cheer someone up)

p.s: ignoring a person addressing u is very rude. haha

2008-04-18T02:04:00.000+08:00

I passed

2008-04-15T00:45:00.008+08:00

First Love

By Utada Hikaru

Found a damn cool lyrics.... viewer online. hope this embed works.

I'll upload the song on the imeem playlist(its on the column on the right below the tagboard in case u did not know) soon. Imeem isn't really working right now. buggerred.

Saigo no kisu wa
Tabako no flavor ga shita
Nigakute setsunai kaori

Ashita no imagoro niwa
Anata wa doki ni irun darou
Dare wo omotterun darou

You are always gonna be my love
Itsuka dareka to mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to love
You taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Ima wa mada kanashii love song
Atarashii uta utaeru made

Tachidomaru jikan ga
Ugokidasou to shiteru
Wasuretakunai koto bakari

Ashita no imagoro niwa
Watashi wa kitto naiteru
Anata wo omotterun darou

You will always be inside my heart
Itsumo anata dake no basho ga aru kara
I hope that I have a place in your heart too
Now and forever you are still the one
Ima wa mada kanashii love song
Atarashii uta utaeru made

You are always gonna be my love
Itsuka dareka to mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to love
You taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Mada kanashii love song
Now and forever

p.s: beacuse i'm a girl by kiss has a nice mv. :)

i decided to delete the viewer as people are having trouble visiting my blog

2008-04-09T14:03:00.001+08:00

Li Sheng Jie- Cha Jian Er Guo

the same guy who sang' shou fang kai'

off to interview.

2008-04-08T23:37:00.002+08:00

work

its been... 3 weeks since i started work.
times have been good and bad.
the people i work with are.... good and bad. but then who am i to judge.lol.

bored at work, at centerpoint.

chop chop chop chop chop!

end product.black envelope.there's a blue twin from a blue chop too.

and today, was rather pissed off cuz my dear slacker colleague who was playing the com and smoking half the time. and sitting around the other half, got all the 'walk-ins'! freaking @#$%^&*!@ heng la. or maybe i super suay. roar. nvr work also can get money.

but a nice lady whom i lent my umbrella to, gave me this when she returned it. kinda made my day. cuz i kinda gave up umbrella as gone with the wind. even tho its just a sweet, but its still nice. :)

2008-04-06T22:39:00.002+08:00

Qn. 2.) looks are important. Discuss.

standard GP question you see.
and what will your answer be?
maybe i'll type out an essay one day.

on another issue, work is getting really tiring and boring.
stupid locations and timings for the roadshows are really NOT bringing in the customers.
how am i ever gonna see my money this way?
plus the damn flu,sneezing and dry eyes are really getting on my nerves.
oh yea. so boring i've started to read bbc and straits times online. finally caught up on the tibet-china issue. and found out microsoft is gonna buy over yahoo too. wow.

oh. prices are going up.
on EVERYTHING. seriously. rice, oil, petrol, bread, property, every single shit.
the only things getting cheaper are electronics.
and pay is always the same.
what happenned to the $1 bonjeur bread i used to buy in sec sch everynight?

2008-04-03T01:41:00.002+08:00

Cableski and laggy com

Went Batam to cableski with Guoxi, Daryl and Bamboo yesterday.
was a damn impromptu thing.
i basically msged them on saturday to see if they were interested to go boarding on my offday.
which was tuesday. and we booked the tix on monday morn and set off on tuesday morning.
haha.
super fun.
i attempted to make a vid of all the vids we took.
AND THE STUPID COM REFUSES TO LET ME SAVE IT!!
WASTED DONNUE HOW MANY FREAKING HOURS OF MY TIME AND EFFORT.
ARGHHHHHH

pissed off.

anws. it was damn fun(the cableski)
with the v playful dogs and the fact that the whole park was almost ours.
learnt how to stand, toe and heel edge, switch legs(donnue what its supposed to be called), do it with one hand, and touch the water with the other.
even attempted the ramp a few times. the 1st 3 times was because i didn't know how to steer and went up cuz i just kept drifting left. the next 3 times were for fun.
sunburnt and muscle ache.

STUPID COM! ARGHHHHHHHHHHH

2008-03-26T19:29:00.008+08:00

deviant art

pics from deviant art.
i found a cosplay link. and boy the cosplayers were really STANDARD SIA!
see for yourself.

p.s: credits go to deviant art for hosting, and all the original authors and photographers.i just ripped them. ;)

1st, the Naruto Series.

Sakura.Chio sia.

Funny Naruto.f.y.i. i think she's a girl

Gaara, and she shaved her eyebrows! plus 45min makeup per eye. o.0

ERO-SANNIN! Jiraiya.i don't believe he died. oh. another girl.

Orochimaru. Owns. Period.i can just imagine the forked tongue.

Shikamaru.i like the photoshopping.

Temari.i love the fan.

TenTen. o.0

Neji. girl i think

And Hinata who looks fiercer than neji.

Guy and ROCK LEE! HOLY SHIET~!

Pretty Haku. The ice guy who was Shibuya's plaything. girl

One of the ninja's. can't rmbr his name. another girl.

Deidara.with his exploding clay. KAI!

Hidan. the one who refuses to die. until shika's team killed him... right?

And to end off the series, Sasuke and Sakura. the sasuke looks crappy.but its here cuz of the sakura. ;)

And the next one. Deathnote.

L. and i thought this was the movie poster.

Near. with huiling's cat paw sign!LOL. f.y.i: girl

sweets.

Bleach (and misc. below)

Grimmjaw. No.6.... right? oh. girl again.

Vampire nights.

a comic i read a lil. the one on the left looks good.

Storm troopers!

D-Grey man.

And Hitman Below.

P.S: if u realised. most of the good cosplayers are female. why sia? isit cause male characters in manga/animes look like girls? haha

2008-03-23T22:54:00.003+08:00

F.A.T

fredrick aregon trotevelle i think. or smth alogn the lines of tt. from the old enid blyton books.
been to Ipoh(Malaysia) the past few days. eat and sleep and eat and sleep.
i'm fat.

my idea beach. minus the big waves. big big waves.and lots of surfboarders, and babes.

cool pics from deviant art.

2008-03-20T13:23:00.004+08:00

i remember

packed my drawer last night, a uncovered lots of old stuff, and ang bows from 3 years back. it was quite a windfall actually.3 years worth of unopened angpows.ha.

i remember.

2008-03-17T11:39:00.003+08:00

action at last

well not really action la, but at least i've had smth to cure my boredom for the past 2 days.sat was swimming and a movie, #1 rule. which was freaky due to its sound effects and an encounter i had after the show.sunday was sentosa, which kinda failed cuz it rained when we reached. so we kidna wasted $3.

haha. den went back to vivocity to catch some cosplayers.

In case you don't know, the pictures are of "L and Mello" from death note, Sakura and Naruto from Naruto, and a random nurse from donnue what manga. there were many more, but either the pics were not clear or i didn't take a pic of them. there were 'Dgreyman', 'Airgear', 'FF7', just to name a few. the costumes were nice, but the people in them... made up for it with their enthuesm i guess. my 1st cosplay experience. cool.

next was a movie. Horton. haha. thought it wld be quite cock. but turned out not bad. pretty funny.

'people are people, no matter how small', 'one person, even the smallest, makes a difference', 'believe in yourself, even when no one does', 'mommy is not always right', 'the power of speech'

2008-03-15T12:42:00.002+08:00

outram shooting

Most people should know about this.

if not here's a brief background. a man stabbed his drinking partner to death, and fled to outram mrt under police pursuit. at the station, he rushed 2 police officers with his knife, and was shot dead by one.

so the moral issue is, should the officer have shot the guy dead? is he dealing his own justice here?

arguments are that he should have shot his limbs, slow him down, or maybe not draw his weapon and disarm him. or used his stun gun or baton.

at that point of time the officer would probably be experiencing 'ARGHHHHHHH wtf?! shoot or not?! shoot where? how how how how how?! die le lar'. or not. i'm just speculating. tt'll be my mental reaction if i were him. and my conclusion will be? still shoot him. why? he's rushing me with a knife, and may deal grevious hurt to me, or someone else, if i don't take him down. and if i aim the hands or legs, i may miss. its not easy to hit a moving target's limbs, since they're moving too. and i can't afford to miss. so the place to aim would be the chest, which, coincidentally would kill him. and why not the stungun? cause in that moment i would ahve forgotten about it. lucky the dude only fired one shot. if not its gg for him.

and now comes to the aftermath. how to live with the knowledge that you killed a person, and the general public may not have agreed with ur actions even though you are aquitted by the law. tough decisions to be made in split second situations. one in a (lot, i donnue how much) police officers in singapore will face that dilemma. and its because of that, even tho most of them are chao slackers, i respect them.

Well thats teh end of what i think. random post. haha

and i came across this when i was browsing getty images for the pic above. reminds me of someone we know who would do that when she's bullied. ha

2008-03-13T23:27:00.003+08:00

stop and stare

too much time in my hands.

thinking too much.

accepting i am who i am, and some things can't be changed no matter how much i try or think about.

accepting my place.

changes, how?

why? or maybe there isn't a why.

never satisfied, with too much or too little time.

self-discipline and self-confidence.

sacrifices and achievements.

indifference and disturbance.

regrets and hope.

oh so much.

emulation. will that ever help?

improvement. will i ever?

why am i unable to help?

2008-03-12T23:32:00.002+08:00

to

do the right thing, say the right things to the right person at the right time.

overzealousness and insecurities

2008-03-10T22:13:00.002+08:00

BORED

i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.i'm bored.

spent the whole day being bored. i really need a job NOW.
no money and too much time. and yet i'm still procrastinating on things i gotta do.
I WANT TO WORK.

bored beyond belief.

P.S: blogger still ain't letting me upload the photos. check below post for future updates. but everyone prob saw the pcis in hend's and huiling's blog alr. ah wells

2008-03-06T22:28:00.006+08:00

Tribute to HuiLing (edited)

yea u read it right. this is a tribute to our fren/travel partner/cook/entertainment system/landlord.
Thanks Huiling, for everything.
for letting us trash ur house,
for cooking all the delicious meals, and i seriously mean it. i liked them.i'm no food critic, but they were good.it reminds me of home. so much so tt i don't miss home at all. ;) The pics of all the meals cooked can be found in hendric's blog, since i don't have any pics now.
for letting us bully you the whole way, half the stuff we say we don't mean it, i hope u know.
for being such a great sport, playing all the foolish games and all.
for showing us around the place,
for being such a hardworking kayaking partner. ;p i swear i din slack tho. i don't know why we ended up so slow. must be me being so weak. ;)
and thanks for just being you.

and NO,
ur not weak, ur pretty darn strong for a girl alr,
ur not fat, serious,
ur cute, and its a compliment.
u don't suck.
so quit with the inferiority complex already.

In all, HUILING U ROCK.
don't miss us too much. ;)

P.S: the pics and the summary of the trip will be posted below this in an edited post after i get the pics.
P.P.S: 4 songs have been added into the playlist, songs which we heard alot in NZ.

edited portion!

our 1st cooked dinner from Huiling at Taupo(P.S, i burnt the rice. lol)
as promised, here are some pics. we stopped at day7, skydiving and bungy at Taupo.
so here's day8, when Huiling joined us for Tongariro
some background info. Tongariro was the site 'Mt Doom' in the movie 'Lord of the Rings'.
this trek was relatively short, cuz we din complete it. and why?
cuz we were rather unprepared for the freezing cold weather,winds, and rains.
and we arrived rather late.
and bugger Spencer was trying to do his lameass imitation of 'Samwise'. haha.

and as usual, we did stupid stuff, like taking off our tops in the freezing winds.
and nearly got hypothermia. ha. Dinner was maggie mee. with no photos.

annnndddd, day 9 when we reached Wellington and had to look for a place to sleep at the isite(a place to help backpackers like us find the best accomodation and activitites to participate in).

and chilling out at a beach b4 shopping for groceries for the nights dinner the the next day's breakfast and lunch. Which was pasta. wayy better than the 1st one we had. lol.

day 10-11-12, Abel tasman national park

The sunrise at while waiting to board the ferry to South Island. Credit to whoever took this shot. quite artistic aye?

Our dinner, Green Curry. thai style i think. Quite nice, dispite the colour. This time the rice din burn. ;)
Our kayaks. Super pro. Expedition kayaks. and super stable. it refused to cap no matter how hard i rocked it(din really put much effort into it tho, since i din really want to cap)

The reason why i din want to capsize, all our stuff were inside. :p

The 3 heaviest behind, and the beautiful scenery in the background.

Day 13! Drive along the West coast

checking out the sights on the way down to Greymouth

At lake Matheson where we enjoyed the scenery.
Like looking down at the clouds from the jetty in the sky at spotting the eel. lol.

Nice artistic shot of us at the stony beach skipping stones and finding 'souvinours'. lol.

2 Slackers while the cook does the work. lol.

and fabulous dinner. rice was burnt. cuz we were in the showers. lol

Day 14, Wanaka and Queenstown

Since we had too much rice after the last dinner, the next day's dinner was fried rice in alberttown. and boy was it a terrifying ride there. nearly had to push car there for the lack of fuel. haha. but heng heng we arrived ok. but poor hend lost his preccccioooouuussss.
had a rather cui fried rice and mian sian dinner, cuz huiling left halfway to settle her eftpos(electronic funds transfer point of sales) card.
in the words of edmund 'when i saw eh, why me and yg stirring the mian sian, and shawn and spencer frying the rice, i know thats it, good game' hahhaa.
puzzling world was quite fun. went spent $10 to go in, and ended up sitting outside for 2 hrs figuring out free puzzles. haha stupid asians.

The trick used in Lord of the Rings. See, spencer's so shortt!! hahaha

the maze, which was rather hard and fun. shiokk. finished the difficult challenge. and Edmund was king!
Furgburgers in Queenstown.

Nice right? ahha 'scissors paper stone'

Can't see me...

Day 15, Cycling in Clyde

Dinner was jap curry. in a bbh with lots of flies at night. haha. and gained alot more general knowledge from a game. Cycling was shiokk. with incredible slopes and small tracks, which i think was meant for dirt biking. and we chionged tt in mountain bikes. shiok sia. cycle until almost cramped.

taking the pic below

view from the seat of the king, above the 'clock on the hills' haha.pics on hen's blog.

And the bikes we rented. rather zai man.

Day 16 and 17 in Christchurch

stupid blogger don't let me upload pics again

2008-02-26T20:10:00.006+08:00

Day 7! White-water rafting and Huka falls

after black water, we come to the next activity, white water.

we've done white water several imes before in malaysia alr, so this one was a similar experience, except with greater rapids, and higher water falls. an 'improvement' from the previous grade 3 river to this grade 5 river.

according to our jap raftman(or smth), the 7m fall which we did was the highest white water fall in the world. hmmmm.... lol.

was rather cool tho i must say. ha.

On to the pictures!

Breakfast before the white water at Rotorua.It was mozerella cheese and bacon on toast. shiokk.

Us taking the kayaks leaning against the wall of the changing room as urinals. lol. surprise!
with our guide after the trip. (it was short but fun, esp the 3m or so jump into the rapids and swim after we carried the dinghys up.heheh)

At Huka Falls just before we reached Taupo. The fastest and clearest blue natural flowing water body ever. totally sweet.

fooling arnd in the BBH(Taupo,can't rmbr the name) after we arrived.

Shagged out for the night.

Bungy before Skydiving. Just look at the water. Ich, Ni, San, Bungy!!

Skydiving at taupo!12k ft. freefalling feels AWESOME!

P.S: i would love to post more pics and more stuff on what we've done. but its alr 3am, and the internet connection here is snail slow. so check out the next entry at hendric's www.bloominglimes.blogspot.com

the next chapter, HuiLing joins us after skydiving, and the meals keep getting better!

Till then, cheers!

2008-02-15T22:44:00.005+08:00

1st Leg of the Journey to NZ

15th Feb 2008, Friday
Photos from Changi airport and Brunei
As expected, there wasn't anything much to do in Brunei, except eat lunch, dinner and play cards.

awaiting the next part.

NEW ZEALAND HERE WE COME!!

Group Pic in Changi Airport. Check out the vid below for our preflight entertainment =)

Signing up for...

click up to see the video!!!!

how idiotic i was...

This is what happens when you fall asleep in the plane... -.-

singapore chicken rice in brunei?
our dinner feast!!!!!the annihilation of our feast... roar
how lame can the hotel get?
doing what we do best with no entertainment in brunei. watching movies!! yes it's porn

-end of day 1-

Look out for our next post at:

the place where fruits bloom... =)

weff riddles guys

2008-02-14T23:55:00.004+08:00

on to a journey of a life time

flying off to NZ tmr lo! the start of a long planned and enticipated trip.
made a stupid stupid decision, to go to dbl o last night.
ended up depriving myself of sleep and moeny.
and it wasn;t even fun.
trance till 2am. wtf?
and the girls were... urgh unspeakable. and according to most pple, i have low standards alr.
so oh mann.
but there was a lion dance somewhere at 11pm. cool sia.

The stuff i'm bringing for NZ.

seems alot, but actually i tink i got the least. haha

some displays at action city.

zZz.

nights!!

2008-02-12T00:59:00.000+08:00

more fast updates

the celebrations for CNY have came and gone.
its... chu 5 now.
and i lost arnd $80 in gambling. hahahaa
seems like this year lady luck decided to elope on me.
but oh wells, CNY kai xin jiu hao.
money can be earnt next time. (earnt? sounds wrong. i think it shld be earned)

anws, no pics or media for this post.
caiqin'g hse and celebrated joseph's 21st on friday night.
was rather ok. and ended up playing cards. with a few classic moments. haha.
shiqi's hse, jaso's hse on saturday. and sent joseph off.
forgot to do some stuff and felt quite guilty, but its all well and settled.
had a chat on sunday, to resolve some rather old issues.
i'm glad i got it off my chest.
at last i slpt relatively early at 2am on sunday night, compared to the 7am 'naps' i've had since 29th jan.

in all, a relatively happenning cny for me.
even tho my maternal family was in china, i did more visiting with friends this year. haha
funn. i hope we'll still do this 20 years down the road or smth.

oh and i finished a romance novel.
nvr thought i'ld read tt genre before.
rather long, but enjoyable to a certain extent.
kinda opened my eyes to what girls read.
haha.

another $2k on the Nz trip. brining it up to a total of $3.3k.
but i know its gonna be money well spent. :)
i need jobs now, or after i come back in MAR.
haha.

oh and shiqi added a few songs to my playlist. the old songs are still at the back in case u want them. this new series are more on R&B. so called 'clubbing' songs. haha. coming from a girl tt doesn't club. cute.

2008-02-07T03:26:00.000+08:00

XIN NIAN KUAI LE

Gong xi fa cai, wan shi lu yi, nian nian you yu, shi shi xun li, chu lu ping an, cai yuan gun gun!

XIN NIAN KUAI LE!!

its CNY again! freak we're getting OLDER.

Tuesday went for a lil 'grp interview' which we all know means it won't be an interview. as expected, we filled out some forms, they asked a few qns, let us know abt the coy, etc. it was at rivervalley road, and by some miscomm, we took a long bus ride there from bishan. but the bus was wayyy coool la. check it out. with bucket 'bar-type' seats, and u-shape-ed sofas at the back, COOL! and i had a nice sleep too. haha

Caught a movie 'Chang Jiang 7' on wed with guoxi,daryl and bam. in my opinion, not worth watching. it wasn't v funny, and its attempt at making it a touching story kinda failed.lotsa recycled ideas from old stephen chow movies. caught a couple making out at the stairs tho. lol. short glismp in the vid. ;)

My aunt did up a photo album of the europe trip. nice man. haha. 2 sample pages. ;)

Thats all fro now. HAPPY CNY EVERYONE!

2008-02-05T01:05:00.000+08:00

fast updates

Bored at work

Shopping for Shiqi's present
Guess who.

Pl outing aft work on fri

CL's Farewell gathering at brewerks aft Pl outing

Hair spraying by wing at shiqi's party

Too k.o-ed after 2 days and nights of no-sleep.(ok tt was gramatically wrong

Hair again.

2008-01-28T00:36:00.000+08:00

the week

started full day shift on thursday. 11am to 10pm.
it means more money. but also SUPER BOREDOM. yawnz.
to the extent of taking random photos.

Chinatown with my family.
and my big bag. banging arnd.
and it'll be worse during cny.

prep for the b'dae celebs.
and errands to run.
window washers at marina sq.
cool sia. reminds me of climbing.
haiiiiiii. i so want to climb.

A vid of the china(i guess) street performers at orchard rd on sat night b4 billy bombers. they can't possibly be older than 10. and look at the moves! makes me feel so lousy. haha.

OH! btw, the milkshakes at billy bombers at cine ain't tt nice. i prefer the central one with the metal shakers. shiokk.

2008-01-23T21:51:00.000+08:00

ambigram

was experimenting with drawing an ambigram of my name.

and here's draft 1, prototype. haha

Comments!

2008-01-22T23:49:00.000+08:00

youtubes

was listening to the radio on my way home, and well they were playing some emo songs.
and as u can expect, it got me in the mood
LOL

so here are some youtube mtvs.

The All American Rejects - It ends tonight

Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can't explain myself at all.
And all the wants
And all the needs
All I don't want to need at all.

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight
It ends tonight.

A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
You're finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such disdain

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

Now I'm on my own side
It's better than being on your side
It's my fault when you're blind
It's better that I see it through your eyes
All these thoughts locked inside
Now you're the first to know

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,It ends tonight.
TonightInsightWhen darkness turns to light,It ends tonight.

Gary Cao Ge -Super Woman

Damn my com is lagging again

2008-01-21T01:29:00.000+08:00

Random pics of the few days

Shopping with ed, spen and justina.
looking beng with the necklace(not mine btw)

i packed my wardrobe!
see the shiny thing there?

The inside. i got quite lil clothes

And this is the Shiney thing

Taken with flash.

I like the life i'm leading now. please let it stay for as long as possible. haha

2008-01-19T01:17:00.000+08:00

new musak!

haha. ok tts just me trying to act cool by saying musak instead of music.
new tracks added to the playlist.
Give it to me by nelly and timbaland on request by shujuan.
Only love by trade mark. another one of the nice oldies.
Flintstones! from the old cartoon which i liked!
yang guang zhai nan by jaychou. on request by edmund.
Alvin and the chipmunks badday.

I'm justed watched the movie halfway!
ok, i'm laggy, but late is better than never no?
haha. its damn cool la!
how often u get a beatboxing chipmunk?! hahaha.
and the next few songs are in their voices too.

-WAIT FOR ME!!! i still got some baby fat left over u know.
-u know i can't hang liek this forever.
-JUST JUMP already will u!
hahahhahahaha

2008-01-15T12:25:00.000+08:00

Failed

i FAILED

FAILED

failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.failed.

Failed. my stupid driving test.
i did smth i've never done b4 in all my pratices and lessons.
I MOUNTED THE CURB IN S-COURSE!
it was my fav course in the circuit somemore la! cuz i cld do it rather effortlessly!
AND I WENT TO MOUNT CURB! WTF!!!
i can't believe it. wts.
ARGHHHH.
noob me.
now i gotta refresh the ssdcl site everyday to find a slot tt someone cancelled if i want to brin the test forward. HAI.

NOOB ME

2008-01-12T21:38:00.000+08:00

crap

i'm sliding into infatuation.
felicia chin.

did i use the noun correctly?

2008-01-11T13:18:00.001+08:00

driving

practical test in 3 days.
wish me luck.
:)

2008-01-08T14:43:00.000+08:00

pictureless

haha. this post has no pictures, cuz mainly i din take any recently.
this taxi concierge job is really... boring.
but i'm not complaining, yet.
finished my tuition homework (YES! tuition homework! now i sound like some sec 1 kid), read up the whole Amath syllabus and completed several missions on GTA. And finished up a few chapters of the book i'm reading. haha. AND get money.
thats rather. good.

Just heard from a friend who's going NZ too, for holiday work!
and his pay is NZ$800/week! tt translates to abt 4k sing a mnth! omg.
i wanna do that in aust too. is there such a thing?

Off to work soon, and to make up for the lack of photos, here are some youtube vids.
Fish Leong's songs.

P.S: i updated my links, and realised that i got very few links haha. any requests to be linked can be sent via sms, or tag-ed at the tagboard.
AND i updated the wants list too. but its by no means exhaustive. i'll like anything anyone gets for me anws. lol.

2008-01-05T11:19:00.000+08:00

dbl o

on friday night after work with the guys.
and it was DAMN FUNNY!
with kw drunk, and the rest of us high.
the drinks were really cheap, and the music was better than zouk.
i think i'm a convert. hahaha.
pics and vids below. have a nice laugh! lol.

When we were still ok. when i wasn't red.

Getting redder

And freaking red.

Wtf gay?

our 1st tequila shots and vodka lime.and kw died after this

and me too actually

but in the end who was the drunk shit? i still insist people who get red easily don't get drunk easily. ;P

2008-01-04T01:28:00.000+08:00

Musick!

alright i've added a little playlist to the banner on the right. its all the way below.
and i don't know how to change the width to suit the template w/o hiding some of the stuff inside.
so well just bear with it.
any pros wanna teach me?

the songs are more 'old school', cuz tt'll make them timeless. and i don't hafta change them too often. ;)

They are:
Love Me by Colin Raye
Hui You Na Me Yi Tian by Lin JunJie (song adaptation of love me)
Kai Bu Liao Kuo by JayChou (no particular reason, cuz it was a hot fav in sec sch)
Lian Ren Wei Man by S.H.E (Liked it since i heard a friend humming it on the train)
Xin Tai Ruan by Ritchie Ren
Ben Xiao Hai by Andy Lau and Jackie Wu and Xiao Hei (a respite from all the emo songs above)
Ai Wo Bie Zhou by Zhang Zhen Yue (cuz its a nice song)
Xiao Zhen Gu Niang by Tao Ze (one of my favs from him)
Lemon Tree by Fool's Garden (RMBR PRI SCH!!! haha)
I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing by Aerosmith (i loooovvvve this song)
Truely Madly Deeply by Savage Garden
Apologize by One Republic (cuz its my current fav. and i tink it'll b an oldie. i hope. haha)
One in a Million by Bosson (i tink it was my ringtone once, B4 MY HP GOT STOLEN BY SOME BUGGER)
And get ready for it!
Halfway round the world by A*Teens, Mambo No.5 by Lou Bega and Slam Dunk by Five (Orientation songs from JC! muahahahaha)
Superman by Five for Fighting
Majulah Singapura by Zubuir Said (cuz i love Singapore, and it reminds me of the days when we had to sing this every morning. how many of u still do that now man?! and i tink its the old version, with just the lady singing. haha)

Well enjoy the songs!
any song dedications are welcome! hahhahaha

2008-01-03T19:27:00.000+08:00

Slacking at home

spent the day cleanign up my room, and washing the bags.
and thanks to hendric, i got a job! i hope. myuahaha.
taxi concierge at Central at clark quay.
i tink it's gonna be a duang job. only from 4.30 to 10pm somemore. weird hours.

My room b4.

And during cleaning

I found a sniper cap from the NCC days, and when i used it for kayaking once. and the stones i assumed i picked it off the place we landed. coney island i tink?

My room after. Looks much better right?! hahaha

washed my damn dirty bag. if u can see, the water is OPAQUE black! mannn.

And smth rahter interstign i found online.

its about colourblindness.

u can take the colourblind test to see if ur re-green clolurblind, LIKE ME!

or read out on why and how u get colourblindness from

http://colourblind.freeservers.com/